Oh What A Night!
by Sea and Wolf
Summary: Two fair maidens from the land of Virginia fall into Middle Earth after a night of inebriation in the forest. Once there, they catch the fancy of a certain elf and wizard. Messed up? Oh yeah. Mary-Sue? We don't know. Scandal? But of course, savvy?
1. Chapter One

Disclaimer: Well...welcome to our story. The fact that you've clicked on it reveals that you have excellent taste..cough cough. Anyways, we did not write Lord of the Rings, Tolkein did. If you don't recognize any characters, then they're probably ours. Oh, one more thing. We kinda changed the way the trilogy ends, so just so you know, the elves, wizards, hobbits, and other assorted creatures aren't going on any boat trip to the Grey Havens anytime soon. That said, on with the story!!!  
  
"Whiskey, vodka, scotch..." Tala called off, handing them one by one to Nerina, who stuffed them into their bookbags. "Ah! Hello Sir! Hey Nerina, I found the greatest man in history."  
  
"Oooo...is that who I think it is?" she asked eagerly.  
  
"Oh yeah. Say hello to Captain Morgan, bringing Indies Gold," she exulted, holding up the bottle and smiling at Nerina's happy cries.  
  
Tala stood, closing the door to the now empty liquor cabinet, straightening her black leather jacket. Johanna's party had become a total bore, so hyped on party energy, Nerina had made an awesome suggestion. To raid the liquor cache in the kitchen and have a much better party...at home, with other, cooler people.  
  
Voices carried down the hall, and they heard Johanna coming. They quickly glanced at each other and raced out the kitchen door. They hid on the porch, and then made their way toward the steps tiptoeing so Tala's black leather, heeled, boots didn't make any noise. Of course, Nerina's sandals were silent. Before they got far, both giggled after bumping into each other, and they heard Tim's voice (he's Johanna's boyfriend) through the open window.  
  
"Hey! I think there's someone outside. Johanna, switch on the porch light."  
  
"Thanks a lot Tim," Tala growled. "Run for the woods!"  
  
They sprinted in to the woods surrounding Johanna's house, after much clattering on the porch and almost falling in the yard, as Nerina's patchwork skirt wasn't overly conductive to escape and kept snagging. The porch light switched on and they ducked behind a bush. Still giggling quietly, they watched Tim, Johanna, and a few others walk out and look around, but they quickly lost interest and went back inside.  
  
Nerina and Tala looked at each other, and by unspoken agreement, walked further into the forest, thoroughly pleased with themselves. They soon came to a log in a little clearing and took seats on it. Each pulled their backpacks forward and rifled through, seeing what Nerina had put in each.  
  
"Ah ha! I got the Captain!" Nerina crowed in triumph, pulling out the bottle and opening it "Mmm...smell that. Just great." She took a sip and happily smiled as it went down.  
  
Tala smirked but held up the bottle of whisky and opened it. After enjoying the liquid fire, she said, "Alright, share." They exchanged bottles, and then exchanged again.  
  
They soon began to feel very happy, and Nerina thought that the clearing looked particularly magical and said so. "And isn't tonight the umm...umm...eclipse, right?"  
  
Tala nodded, "Think so."  
  
"Hmm, the moon is so pwetty. Just like Tim's Dad's eyes. They're pwetty," Nerina said with a slightly dreamy look as she twined a lock of her waist length brown hair around a finger.  
  
"Nah, more like his brother's. And why ya thinkin' 'bout her boyfriend's dad? Thas icky," Tala said, waving the bottle in Nerina's general direction.  
  
"Yeah," she stood up, weaving, and pointing an accusatory finger at Tala said, "Well, at least I don't mess with gangs." She immediately sat back down, or more like fell.  
  
"Hey! I resemble that remark. 'Sides, even you liked Axle," Tala said, slapping Nerina's shoulder with the whiskey bottle.  
  
This caused them both to fall backwards off the log, and they both burst into drunken laughter after impact.  
  
"You are the bestest friend anyone could ever have!" Nerina proclaimed.  
  
"You too," Tala agreed. She yawned, "Luv ya, 'Rina."  
  
"Wuv you too," Nerina slurred.  
  
And with that, they both passed out.  
  
Tala groaned as she rolled over. Carefully squinting in very bright light, she realized a few things. One- she had rolled into a mass that turned out to be Nerina. Two- they were outside, and Three- she had a TERRIBLE headache.  
  
She felt Nerina sit up and then was poked in the side.  
  
"You awake too?" Nerina asked. She winced at her own voice, clutching her head.  
  
"Shh! Not so loud!" Tala whispered in response, slowly sitting up.  
  
Nerina struggled to her feet, and Tala tried to follow, but decided crawling was a better idea. Nerina stretched, readjusting her peasant blouse and green head scarf, and Tala looked around for their bags. She spied hers and crawled toward it.  
  
"Got you now you..." her voice trailed off into silence as she noticed feet beyond the bag. "Uhh...Nerina..." she called.  
  
"What?" Nerina responded, slowly turning in Tala's direction as she picked leaves from her hair. Her eyes widened as her gaze rested on Tala, who was staring a human down the business end of an arrow.  
  
Tala warily eyed the arrow and the man holding it. When he moved the arrow towards her face, she slid backwards, as black leather pants have the tendency to slide, dragging her bag with her. He repeated the motion and she got the message, sliding all the way to Nerina, who had already snatched her pack off the ground. After helping Tala stand, who was now glaring at the guy with the bow, Nerina looked around, and then quickly jabbed Tala with her elbow, who also looked.  
  
"Ah, I don't think we're in Kansas anymore, Tala."  
  
Tala agreed with a very succinct, "Damn."  
  
They were surrounded by men armed with bows. All were hooded and wore greens and browns of the forest. One of the men (the one who 'threatened' Tala) began to speak in a very strange language, and the women simply looked at him in confusion, then at each other. Mischief lit Tala's eyes, and before Nerina could stop her, she turned to the men and said, "So are you Robin Hood and his Merry Men?"  
  
The man seemed to bristle at the mocking in her voice, and apparently deciding they weren't a threat, threw his hood off to glare at her. The rest followed suit, and the two quickly realized several things. Being warm-blooded, living females, the first was that each man was drop dead gorgeous. The both assumed startled looks, but they grew even more incredulous when they saw their captors' ears. They were pointed. Putting two and two together, they quickly looked around, realizing where they stood was not the same clearing as the night before. There was no log, just grass, and the trees were much bigger.  
  
"Well, now I know we're really not in Kansas anymore, Nerina," Tala murmured.  
  
Their attention was quickly drawn back to Archer #1, who was very slowly pronouncing words to them. They simply stood and looked at him with bland expressions, and the other archers quickly conversed with the first. They seemed to reach some sort of decision, and raising their bows, they began to herd the women forward. Nerina and Tala soon got the point (A/N: yeah...bad pun...but still) and walked forward, following the first archer.  
  
"Hey, Tala, let's sing," Nerina suggested out of the blue. The silence was getting to her.  
  
"Why?" Tala answered with raised eyebrow.  
  
Nerina shrugged, "Because they can't understand and I feel like it."  
  
"Alright fine. Just keep your voice down. My head is still throbbing," Tala said rubbing her temple as she readjusted her book bag.  
  
Nerina nodded, and broke into This is Halloween. Tala soon joined in, both ignoring the men...err...elves, who all winced a little but made no move to silence them, instead they just ignored them. After that, Yo Ho Ho and a Bottle of Rum, and half way through Bootylicious, they arrived to a set of huge gates. They looked up at the amazing artistry in the metal of the doors, which seemed to depict different lives of the elves. As they passed through, they looked around avidly.  
  
They passed, stables, corrals, and other assorted buildings, as well as through courtyards. After passing through a final courtyard that had an astounding fountain, a dragon mid-roar with wings extended, they descended a set of stairs inside a large stone building.  
  
"Maybe now we'll get a really nice room," Nerina whispered quietly.  
  
Archer #1 opened a door and motioned them forward. It wasn't until they heard the key turn in the lock of the door and got a good look at the room did they understand where they were.  
  
A dungeon cell.  
  
A/N: SOOOOOOOOOOO...whacha think???? Please leave a review to tell us!! We r dyin to know! (and any flames will go straight to the Dragon Feeding collection) ;) 


	2. Chapter Two

Disclaimer: Alright, again, we don't own anything you recognize. If you don't recognize.it's probably ours. And since we love you all so much, we decided to give you two chappies! We know.just can't contain the excitement. Right, on with the fun adventure! Enjoy!  
  
"Great. Just wonderful. Now what do we do?" asked Tala as she glared at the small window in the door.  
  
"Well," Nerina said as she slowly sat onto one of the two cots (the only furniture in the room), "we could enjoy ourselves."  
  
Tala turned and raised an eyebrow, her face easily asking How?  
  
Nerina simply reached into her pack and took out the scotch. Tala's eyes brightened and after taking a handy-dandy pack of playing cards from her bag, sat on the foot of the cot and dealt a hand of five card draw. They sat there for quite a while, and using the feeble light provided by the high, grated window of the cell, played a million games of poker, Crazy Eights, and Go Fish, at the same time getting happily buzzed from the bottle of Scotch.  
  
They were on their eleventh game of Go Fish when they heard the tumblers in the door shift and then the door opened. They twisted to face the door, and watched a tall, old man walk through. His hair and beard were white, even his robe and walking stick were, but he looked in the prime of life and quite healthy. Definitely not feeble. Tala cocked her head toward her friend and saw the gleam of interest in her blue eyes. Before the man, and yes, he was a HU-man, or at least he had rounded ears, could say anything, Nerina asked, "Are you our lawyer?"  
  
His eyes widened a little in surprise and Tala burst into laughter. Nerina soon did, but their amusement quieted when they saw the man standing there with his arms crossed and a stern, yet puzzled, look on his face. He began to speak, but as neither had a clue as to what he was saying, they simply looked at him then turned back to their game.  
  
"Well, I guess he won't understand either. Have any queens?" Tala said.  
  
"Yeah, guess not. And no, go fish," Nerina grinned.  
  
Tala drew and the man seemed to switch languages. Nothing.  
  
"Got any twos Tala?"  
  
"Yeah," she grumbled as she tossed the card over. "How do you always win at Go Fish?"  
  
Another language. Same result.  
  
"The same way you always win at poker," Nerina grinned, placing another pair of cards on her already giant stack.  
  
"Are you two just going to ignore me the WHOLE time?" a voice bellowed from the doorway.  
  
Cards flew into the air as the girls turned to the old man in surprise. He stood there seemingly angry, arms akimbo and glaring.  
  
"You speak English?" Nerina questioned, amazed.  
  
The glare didn't stop. Sheesh, what's with the people and glaring all the time, Tala thought. "No," his rich voice answered curlty, "but I do speak Aslogthian, the language of a distant tribe of men. But the language is almost forgotten as the tribe now barely exists, for only few are ever seen at the borders of their lands. So the fact that you can speak it and dress so...strangely, opens many questions. Ones which must be answered so we know what to do with you. So gather you things, and we will go see the king."  
  
"I really don't like the sound of 'what to do with', Nerina. This could get ugly. Got that warrior ensemble hidden somewhere?" Tala whispered as they gathered the cards and bags.  
  
"Yeah, right where it always is. You?" Nerina answered.  
  
Tala snorted softly, "Always."  
  
They finished and turned toward Mr. White, who walked out and to the right. Several guards fell in step behind the trio, but they were ignored. They followed him, soon climbing a different set of stairs, passing through very long hallways with lots of doors, and a few gardens, the last of which Nerina had to be dragged from, to the amusement of the guards and even Mr. White. They finally came to a huge room. At the other end of the room was a throne upon a dias, a fairly high one (it had five steps up), and upon that was a man. No, elf. He was just as striking as all the elves they had been captured by, but he was more mature looking, especially with a beautiful silver and gold crown, which looked both delicate and powerful, on his golden head. Both ladies simply stared when they came close enough. The king looked around and called a word, someone's name they decided, and a door opened to admit a hurrying elf who quickly climbed the dias to stand to the right of the king. Both women looked at each other, confirming that it was Archer #1. Mr White began to talk rapidly to the king, who nodded as he looked at the women curiously. Archer #1 did the same, but Tala and Nerina ignored them and looked around. Nerina opened her mouth to comment on the tapestries as Tala began to unzip her jacket, for it was warmer in the throne room that it had been in the dungeon, when a voice startled them.  
  
"What are you doing?" Archer #1 asked, watching Tala and effectively halting the conversation between the king and Mr. White.  
  
"Don't do that!" Nerina cried, startled as Tala looked at him as if he were an idiot and said, "Taking off my jacket."  
  
The man looked shocked, and Archer #1 quickly descended the dias striding towards the two. They stepped back, but he grabbed the edges of the jacket and holding them shut, proceeded to drag Tala from the room, all the while saying something like "improper" and "undressing in front of men." Or at least he tried to drag her from the room. He soon realized he wasn't getting very far, for Tala had dug her heels in, and being 5'10" (at the moment 6'1" with the boots) wasn't that easy to move, and Nerina had grabbed her around the waist, adding her 5'9" frame for leverage.  
  
"And just what do you think you are doing?" Tala inquired icily.  
  
"You cannot disrobe in front of these men so I was going to take you into an anteroom where you could readjust your clothing," he answered slowly, as if speaking to a child.  
  
Nerina's and Tala's eyes widened, and both burst into laughter. He stood stunned, while the other men shifted uncomfortably, thinking they had gone mad.  
  
Still grinning, Tala said, "It's just a jacket and I had no intention of doing a striptease."  
  
"Yeah, you did that a month ago at David's party," Nerina said cheekily.  
  
Tala elbowed her gently, "Yup, but even you admit that until I did it was lame party."  
  
Nerina nodded, and Tala, with a quick swipe of her hands, dislodged Archer #1's grip and took a step back. He looked surprised again, as did the others with the exception of Mr. White and the king, who both just looked amused. Nerina let go of Tala's waist, readjusting her green head scarf, and Tala removed her jacket, silently daring anyone to say anything. When neither heard a sound, they looked around to find all eyes on Tala's shirt. Black with a deadly blue flame pattern seeming to reach up from her waist, the silk shimmered and hugged her body.  
  
"Good job Tala. At least now we know how to shut them up," Nerina whispered with a stifled laugh.  
  
Tala smirked, then sighed, and swiftly clapped her hands, loudly. The guys seemed to snap out of a trance, Archer #1 being the last to do so (he got a nasty look for that) and all eyes turned toward Mr. White, who cleared his throat. The king said something, and Mr. White answered, and they both turned to look at the women, who stood looking right back at them.  
  
"Ladies," the king began quietly, "could you tell us where you are from and why you are here?"  
  
Nerina answered first, "Where is here?"  
  
"The throne room of Elven King Thranduil, Kingdom of Mirkwood, the realm of Middle Earth," Mr. White answered with a trace of amusement.  
  
Nerina was about to answer, but stopped when her arm was grabbed by Tala, who, ashen faced, asked in a choked voice, "Did he just say Mirkwood?! Middle Earth?"  
  
Nerina nodded, but the nods slowed as she fully understood. Tala too slowly nodded, whispering, "The books. Freshman year, high school. O God, those talked about Middle Earth..."  
  
Nerina also paled, "So...we are in that dimension?!"  
  
"I think so." Tala scrambled to remember, and Nerina did the same. "The man in white...o jeez, that's no fancy cane, it's a magi's staff!"  
  
Nerina quickly said the name she remembered, "Gandalf?!"  
  
The wizard looked at them surprised, as did everyone else. They watched in further amazement as the women sank gracefully, well...sort of, to the floor, looking stunned.  
  
"'Rina, I know there was a bottle of Polish Vodka. Fork it over," Tala said shakily, holding out her hand.  
  
Nerina nodded dazed, and after opening the bottle and taking a shot, handed it to Tala who did the same.  
  
Reopening her eyes after the bite of vodka lessened, Tala slowly said, "You're Gandalf the White? And this is Middle Earth?" At his nod, both women took another sip. Then, switching to Spanish, quickly decided what to do.  
  
"T think we should tell them," Nerina said.  
  
"Humph. Fine, but I'm keeping my knives handy. They were stupid not to search us," Tala decreed with a wolfish grin.  
  
Recapping the bottle and stuffing it in a bag, they stood.  
  
Nerina cleared her throat and began to speak:  
  
"To be, or not to be, that is the question:  
  
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer  
  
The slings and arrows of outrageous. Ouch, what?" she asked in a hurt tone, rubbing her arm.  
  
"Wrong speech!" hissed Tala.  
  
"Oh, my bad," Nerina said sheepishly.  
  
"Try again," Tala encouraged.  
  
"Alright then," she stood up straight and smiled at her audience. "Gentlemen, my name is Nerina and this is my dear friend Tala. We come from the land of Virginia in the realm of Earth. Consider us to be scholars and," she winked at Tala, "Connoisseurs of life's pleasures. Last night, after leaving a celebration, we fell asleep in a forest clearing and when we woke up this morning, we found ourselves in your world." She raised her hands calmly, "We come in peace and we seek no quarrel with you. Although we are strangers to this world, we have read great tales of Middle Earth in our youth, particularly concerning a war and a quest to destroy the ring of power."  
  
At the mention of the ring, Gandalf, Archer #1, and Thranduil looked at each other in amazement.  
  
"Gandalf, can this be true?" asked Mr. Archer.  
  
"Of course it's true," Tala said in annoyance. "Why would we lie about it?"  
  
Thranduil frowned slightly at his son and smiled at Tala, "Forgive my son's impertinence, Lady Tala, he meant no offense, I'm sure."  
  
Tala grinned, "Oh, that's quite all right your Highness."  
  
"Well," Gandalf said thoughtfully, "I suppose the most important thing to do is to discover how exactly you came to our world. Until then, you will remain here in the palace."  
  
"Oh, I see," Nerina said in a slightly disappointed tone, "Come on Tala, back to the dungeons with us."  
  
Thranduil chuckled at her statement, "No, no, Lady Nerina. You and Lady Tala are now our honored guests. You will be provided with more suitable quarters and your every need will be attended to."  
  
Tala and Nerina looked at each other and grinned before running up to the dais and shaking the king's hand, thanking him profusely. This earned them several incredulous stares and some nervous whispering from the guards.  
  
"Sheesh, see Rina, Even in Middle Earth men can't deal with a woman shaking their hand!" The two girls rolled their eyes and sashayed out of the throne room.  
  
"What strange young ladies," Thranduil said mystified, staring at his thoroughly shaken hands.  
  
"Ladies?!" the Prince said in disbelief. "Is that what they are?"  
  
"They certainly are.different," Gandalf mused aloud, staring at the door the two had just exited through.  
  
"Father, where exactly are they going?" inquired Legolas (A/N: everyone got it? Archer #1=elven prince=Legolas.yay), looking from the closed doors to his father.  
  
For one second the elf (as well as everyone else in the room) were surprised by such an obvious thought. Thranduil recovered and after a moment's consideration motioned to the door, "Follow them, and they are to be housed in the twin rooms in the guest wing. Make sure they make it to tonight's banquet." He stood and swept out of the room through a different door.  
  
Legolas stared after, slack jawed, and finally said, "How did I get stuck babysitting?"  
  
Gandalf chuckled and clapped a hand on the elf's shoulder. " I will help you bear this burden."  
  
Both laughed, and moved to follow their two unusual guests.  
  
A/N: Please hit the review button!!!! Pllllleeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaassssse?? Right, umm.got any ?s or comments...leave a review! Yay! We hope you loved it and thanx for reading! 


	3. Chapter Three

Disclaimer:   
  
Tala: Alright, we don't own anything by Tolkein...*sigh* bummer. We just own us..and l8r whatever new characters out of our imaginations we add.  
  
Nerina: Can't I own Gandalf?  
  
Tala: Not unless u come up with some MAJOR cash  
  
Nerina: Aww. *sad face* Darn.  
  
And now..on with the crazy story! (Please hold all applause...or flames *glare*...until the END of the chappie) Enjoy! :D  
  
P.S.- And we're really not drunks, just enjoy alcohol! So, if u don't approve, don't read, or at the very least don't flame, because it's just for the sake of humor that the characters drink.  
  
P.P.S.- We don't own that bit in the last chappie that Shakespeare wrote.or anythin by him for that matter..  
  
The doors closed behind them and after taking five steps, Tala stopped mid- stride. Nerina spun and gave her a questioning look.  
  
"Where are we going?" Tala asked with eyebrow raised.  
  
"No idea," answered Nerina. Looking around, she grinned and pointed. "How 'bout we go there?"  
  
Tala looked, and saw a green, flowering garden. "Leave it to the flower child to find the nearest plant," she sighed, but nodded. A quick look stole over her face, one Nerina recognized as meaning Tala had way too much energy. Nerina shrugged and when they reached the entrance, completely forgot the look. She became enchanted by all the plants; exotic flowers, gentle trees, draping vines. She began to wander, but eventually looked around realizing Tala wasn't behind her.  
  
She spotted Tala in a clearing, doing the strangest thing. She seemed to be measuring, striding back and forth through the clearing, and apparently done, put her pack and jacket down, took her boots and socks off, and began to stretch. Nerina walked over, wary of what could happen. When Tala looked up at her in the middle of a hurdle stretch and the glint in her eyes caused Nerina to groan.  
  
"Now? You want to practice NOW?!" She practically moaned.  
  
Tala simply stood and smiled her biggest smile, slowly nodding. "Come on, stretch. We've been cooped up too long. You know it. And the flowers won't go anywhere. You can look all you want after you beat me into the ground."  
  
Nerina finally nodded and a smile crept onto her face. She stretched, and Tala stretched some more. Nerina called her readiness, and slowly withdrew the knife hidden at the small of her back. Tala did the same, then pulled a length of string from her bag. Nerina held out her hand and Tala bound their wrists together. Finished, she stepped back and lifted her blade to pose vertical in front of her face. Nerina did the same, and then she lunged. Tala ducked, and thrust her blade up. It was deflected and she leaned back. Nerina sliced down and was blocked. So began a skirmish that lasted about five minutes. Nerina froze as steel touched her neck, and looked up to Tala, who grinned, "My win," she panted.  
  
Nerina nodded, panting also, and slit the bonds. "Time to freestyle." Tala grinned her wolf grin, nodded, saluted, and they began again.  
  
They moved throughout the clearing in a dance both beautiful and deadly. Light glinted off their twin blades, their bodies twisted gracefully. They never once made the other bleed, years of such practice causing them to prevent such. Tala lunged, Nerina whirled and she prepared to ram the blade down in a victory swoop when she was seized from behind and Tala was tackled to the ground in the opposite direction. Both women shrieked in surprise and fury and prepared to turn upon the interruptions. They struggled and each eventually stopped when they realized who was restraining them and shouting.  
  
"Gandalf?!" Nerina panted in surprise, and relaxed her arms.  
  
Tala wasn't as calm. "What the hell are you doing?" she yelled at Archer #1 who was pretty much sitting on her stomach and holding her hands in a death grip.  
  
"Well, we stopped Lady Nerina from killing you or vice versa," Gandalf said easily, releasing Nerina (even though Nerina felt his hands linger just a second too long..hmm..)  
  
Nerina laughed, especially at her friend's predicament, but finally explained as Tala sent her a death glare before returning her deadly gaze to Archer #1. "We were practicing."  
  
"Practicing?! " Both males asked in shock. Archer #1 looked up at her, momentarily distracted, and then found himself on his back with a very sharp blade at his throat held by a not so happy woman. He gulped slowly when he heard Gandalf caught between a gasp and laugh.  
  
"Yes, practicing!" Tala said slowly, thoroughly enjoying watching the archer still in wariness. "Hey,  
  
'Rina, I've got this strange sense of déjà vu, but in reverse. Hmm."  
  
"Now Tala, let him go. You know he didn't have a choice in the forest," Nerina said, sheathing her blade but watching her friend closely, not exactly sure what she would do.  
  
"Yes, Lady Tala. I don't think your host would be overly happy at you damaging Legolas," Gandalf said, still amused at the elf prince's predicament.  
  
Tala sighed, and sprang up. "Okay," she nodded, but looked back at the not so happy elf prince and smirked. She sheathed the blade at her back even as he glared at her as he stood.  
  
Through gritted teeth, he said, "If you will follow us, Lady Nerina and..Tala, we will show you your rooms." He heard Tala growl at the slight, but ignored it and walked toward the garden entrance.  
  
Nerina and Tala gathered their things, and Gandalf acquired a thoughtful look. They all walked through the hallways quietly, the girls marking landmarks. They reached a pair of doors and Legolas opened one and launched into a formal dialogue about the rooms.  
  
"The rooms are identical and are adjoined by a door in the bathroom. There are basically two bathrooms, but there is a door in the wall between. Now, the furnishings." his voice faded as Nerina and Tala blocked him out and began to explore the rooms. There was a bed, complete with a nightstand on each side, a dresser, vanity, and then a sitting area with a small couch, chairs, and a coffee table. There was also a small bookcase, and two doors, one they assumed led to the bathroom, the other to a closet.   
  
The furniture was of gleaming wood, carved with all the artistry of the elves. They were decorated with the colors of Mirkwood, with one difference. Each blended creams, browns, and greens, but in one room the accents were of gold, the other silver. Nerina took the gold after Tala claimed the silver. The girls also made a discovery, which had them practically crowing in delight. Each room had a balcony, and they shared a glance, knowing well that each was thinking of the possible mischief they could get into with such a structure. The bathrooms were done in cool blues, from the deep blue tile at the bottom of the tubs to the cornflower blue of the sink basins. Fluffy white towels rested next to each tub. They also made another discovery, but one that made them not so happy.  
  
"Yo, Prince boy, where's the lock on the connecting door?" Tala asked, swinging it open and looking around.  
  
Legolas glared at the silly name, but still responded while Gandalf and Nerina grinned. "There isn't one." He then got the satisfaction of seeing both women gasp and look ever so slightly uncomfortable.  
  
"What? Have two such close friends need to worry about what the other will do while they sleep?" He inquired, just too innocently.  
  
Both reddened slightly, but shook their heads. "Of course not, we have both learned, usually the hard way, not to disturb the other's sleep or to play pranks. It often turns out badly," Nerina said, wincing at past memories.  
  
"Yes, we're more worried about me walking in on her, or vice versa, in a quite compromising position," at Gandalf's and Legolas's slightly confused looks, she sighed at the density of men's skulls, she said slowly, "You know, as in flagrante delicto.(they were even more confused).arg, in the middle of sex! Got that one, you puddin' heads?!"  
  
They finally got the concept, both reddened slightly, and then both yelled, "NO!"  
  
At the startled and questioning looks of the women, Gandalf coughed and said, "You will not be engaging in such things during your visit, so there is nothing to worry about." He nodded, as did Legolas, fully confident in their opinion.  
  
Nerina bristled, and Tala went Ice Queen. "O really? And why not?" Nerina asked in a dangerous tone, to which Tala added, "Who's going to object? (she smirked) On either side?"  
  
"We do!" both yelled, and then looked sheepish.  
  
"Well, guess what?" said Tala, stalking toward them, causing them to back up until they were out the door (which they didn't quite notice), "YOU have NO say!"  
  
She slammed the door in their faces and threw the bolt home.  
  
********* A/N: Great thanks given to all our reviewers..who are wonderful and get cookies!!! :D The other people who do review will get treats too!!! So, please review!  
  
And to answer questions.  
  
The Goddess Artemis- Lol...umm...the TWO don't.one does.maybe.still working on that. But never fear! There will be some fun romance!  
  
AngelGoddessMissy- As for Nerina's inclination toward older men. "Age is but a number"..so she says. Just go with that, and see what happens! *snicker* 


	4. Chapter Four

Disclaimer: Once upon a time, there were two friends who were bored one night, and decided to write a FANfic. They don't own the recognizable characters, J. R. R. Tolkein does. And then-  
  
Tala: Wait....he's dead...*cries*....so wouldn't the foundation or whatever own it?  
  
Nerina: You interrupted my story!!! Fiend!!! *smacks Tala upside the head*  
  
Tala: Ow!!!  
  
Nerina: Anywayz, *ahem* we don't own any of the stuff u recognize....now enjoy!  
  
************  
  
The Great Hall was filled with voices and soft music. Most everyone was happy, but a gray cloud hung over the Prince and his wizard companion. They slumped slightly in their chairs and didn't eat much, preferring to push food around on their plates. Even the very good elven wine was mostly untouched. The King noticed such, and then noticed something else.  
  
"Legolas? Where are the ladies? If I remember correctly, I specifically said to make sure they were here," Thranduil said, raising his brows.  
  
Legolas jumped a bit in surprise, having been lost in his thoughts about the said women. Or more specifically, one of them. The woman Tala ever so slightly fascinated him, and couldn't quite forget the positions they had been in following him tackling her. He was still a little miffed at her being able to demobilize him so quickly and easily, but still couldn't get over the fact that he had liked the ways her eyes had lit with fire......  
  
Even Gandalf did the same, for his thoughts had strayed in a similar tangent, yet in the opposite direction. Nerina was the object of his thoughts. He was vividly recalling how the lady had felt in his arms, first taut in fury and the ability to spring, and then relaxed and calm. He realized, a little late, that his hands had lingered with the desire to not let go, how interesting . . . . . .  
  
"Well...they weren't hungry, so we left them to get adjusted to their new surroundings," Legolas said smoothly with just a slight hesitation.  
  
Gandalf nodded, seeing a very good excuse and way to escape wrath from the king...but then who exactly would threaten Gandalf the White? Still . . . . . .  
  
"I'm sure their lack of hunger partially results from so much happening so soon. Since you and Gandalf seem to be finished," he said with a pointed look at their plates, with their rearranged piles of food, "why don't you take trays to them? They are surely hungry, and if not now, they will be so later."  
  
Legolas and Gandalf seemed to wince, and Thranduil concealed a smile, suspecting the women were stumping the prince-used-to-getting-his-way and the wizard-used-to-knowing-everything. This could get quite interesting . . . . . . .Thranduil thought with just a hint of glee. Life had become just slightly boring with the peace that had settled over Middle Earth. Not that peace was a bad thing, but a change was needed, and the wise king felt as though these mysterious women would be the harbingers of great change.  
  
"Of course, Father," Legolas finally managed, and sharing a suffering glance with Gandalf, headed to the kitchens to prepare a tray.  
  
******  
  
They reached the door, and their sharp ears detected the faint sounds of shrieks and thumps from inside the room. They looked at each other worriedly, and then Legolas said "They wouldn't have...it's way too soon...They've only been here a few hours!"  
  
Gandalf responded with, "Well, they are very unusual...and we did leave them alone for hours after making them angry-"  
  
A loud crash cut off his words, and they both abandoned the dirty thoughts that had been running through their heads, thinking instead there was danger. Legolas drew a knife at his side, adjusting the tray so it could possibly be thrown, and Gandalf raised his staff. He shouted a word, and the door flew open. A most unusual sight greeted them and caused them to stop short.  
  
Nerina was standing on the bed, her head scarf turned to cover her head differently, making her look oddly like a pirate, pointing a knife in Tala's general direction. Tala was standing beside a knocked over chair and table, holding a knife of her own. Both looked surprised, then a little guilty, and then angry as they realized who it was and where the door had gone.  
  
"What are you doing?" demanded Nerina from her perch on the bed, crossing her arms and tilting her head in a regal pose. Tala nodded, and lifted an eyebrow.  
  
"We heard the crash, and removed the door to make sure nothing was wrong," Gandalf said.  
  
"As you can see, nothing is. If you blow our door open again like that, I'll steal your staff," Tala said, and sheathing the knife proceeded to straighten the chair and table, mumbling something about them ruining a great game of priates. She ignored the outrage that flowed off Gandalf. Then she saw what Legolas carried. She got the funniest look on her face, and ran straight toward him. He stepped back, worried, but then she just grabbed the forgotten tray and sped back towards the bed and Nerina.  
  
"Yay! Nerina! WE finally get fed!" she sang, placing the tray on the bed, and attacking it. Nerina sat down slower, but also ate the food with gusto.  
  
Now Legolas and Gandalf felt pretty guilty (as they should), for they knew the women had not eaten in a while, maybe even a day, and had left them here without the ability to call for or go to any food. They looked at each other and nodded, knowing they shared the guilt. They also thought about how to go about apologizing, but never quite got to it. Instead, they heard a contented sigh from the bed, and looking over, were quite amazed to see that most of the tray had been cleared of food, and Tala was reclining on the pillows while Nerina continued to eat with slow bites, finishing a sugared pear. These women were definitely not what they seemed.  
  
"So, are we going to be well kept captives here rather than badly kept ones in the dungeon?" Tala asked lazily, narrowing her eyes at them from where she reclined. Nerina also looked up, eager to know the answer.  
  
"Of course not, ladies, it was just...that...well..." Gandalf trailed off, not being able to think of a suitable excuse. He looked to Legolas, clearing signally he would have the answer, and Legolas glared back. But Gandalf ignored the glare and looked to the dismantled door. With a quick word he put it back in its place and made sure it was secure.  
  
"We thought it would be more enjoyable for you to be here on your first night than to have to deal with the court and such, but please forgive us for not thinking about the food earlier," Legolas quickly lied, and was relieved to at least Nerina nod, accepting it. Tala still had a suspicious look, but finally gave in and nodded.  
  
"How kind," said Nerina cheerily, "So would you two like to sit down?"  
  
"Better yet," Tala piped up, "why don't give us a quick tour?"  
  
Gandalf and Legolas gulped, knowing they did not yet want to unleash these two in the palace. "Why don't we wait until morning," Gandalf proposed. "Surely you are tired and wish to retire early so you may greet tomorrow fresh."  
  
"No, how about you do so-Ouch! Fine, fine, we'll do it tomorrow," she acquiesced, following a kick to her leg from Nerina, who glared at her. "So, what time are you going to come get us for breakfast and where's the alarm clock?"  
  
The males looked confused, and as Nerina giggled at their expressions, Legolas still answered, "At about eight. Does that suit you?" (A/N: yeah yeah, maybe they don't go by our time increments, etc., but for ease of writing, they do now).  
  
Tala groaned slapping her forehead with her hand, but Nerina ignored her and nodded happily and said, "That's fine. See you in the morning!" She waved, and Tala stood and walked towards them.  
  
Both guys swiftly nodded, and then quickly exited the room, very happy to have escaped something worse.  
  
Tala threw the bolt home, and leaning against the door, groaned again, "Eight? Wonderful."  
  
Nerina laughed, then went to her room after calling goodnight and they slept.  
  
**** A/N: Right, so a bit short, but we're sure you all understand about school . . . . . . etc. ;) But never fear, we shall update again soon!! Thanx to all the reviewers, and hope u enjoyed . . . . . . and will mayb review *puppy eyes* And rum for everyone! And chocolate! Yay! 


	5. Chapter Five

Disclaimer: *AHEM* Hear ye! Hear ye! WE do not own the Lord of the Rings! Or The Hobbit, or-  
  
Nerina: Enough! We all get the point!  
  
Tala: *smirk* Right then. On with the story!  
  
**********  
  
The room was dark and silent as the grave. At least that's the way it was until Nerina breezed into the room humming merrily as she threw open the shutters to let in the cool morning breeze and sunshine. Seeing her best friend was still asleep, she grinned mischievously and crawled onto the bed, so she could perch over her.  
  
"Tala," she whispered softly.  
  
The only response was some incoherent mumbling and Tala burrowing deeper into the bed.  
  
Nerina smiled, deliriously happy about what she was going to do next. She sat up, took a deep breath, and let out a terrible, bloodcurdling shriek.  
  
Tala woke up shouting and threw back the covers. Her eyes darted around and when she saw Nerina, she gasped, "Are you okay?!?"  
  
Nerina was shaking terribly, but after a moment Tala realized she was shaking with laughter.  
  
"I'm going to kill you!" she screamed as she leapt up and knocked her to the floor.  
  
This was the sight that greeted Gandalf and Legolas when they opened the door after politely knocking.  
  
"Stop this at once!" shouted Legolas.  
  
The two girls paused. Tala was holding Nerina's hair in her fist and Nerina was gnawing on Tala's arm.  
  
"For such good friends, it seems odd that we always find you attacking each other," he fumed.  
  
Nerina grinned. "Call it a love-hate relationship," she said cheerfully, as she hugged Tala.  
  
"Get off me," Tala grumbled.  
  
"Still, such friends as you should not fight constantly," Gandalf said. He then looked quizzically at their rumpled clothes. "Do you intend to wear that to breakfast?"  
  
The girls looked down, and Tala said, "Well, I suppose we could change our shirts. We each have an extra."  
  
Legolas nodded thoughtfully. "Or I could go and get some dresses that we keep in storage for traveling nobility. I remember seeing several dresses- "  
  
"No!" Tala practically shouted. She then half-blushed under the gaze of the other three. "Hehe . . . . . . umm . . . . . . how about you just bring us a bunch of material and we'll take care of our clothing."  
  
"Yes! That's a great idea," crowed Nerina, clapping her hands together. "Right, now both of you get out so we can change and we'll be right there!"  
  
The men nodded and exited, and Tala groaned, she had almost made it back to her bed.  
  
*********  
  
After this early morning escapade, the elf and wizard managed to escort the two women to the dining hall (now clad in new shirts-Nerina in a soft green and Tala in deep navy from their bags), where they were greeted warmly by King Thranduil.  
  
"Please come sit near me and tell me something of your world."  
  
After they were seated, Nerina looked at Tala to see if she was going to start talking, but Tala appeared to be torn between sleeping at the table, and eating a tasty looking muffin-like confection. Seeing that she wasn't going to get any help from that corner, Nerina sighed and launched into a story.  
  
"And that my friends, is the sad, but true, tale of Phineas Gage," she concluded softly in a respectful tone.  
  
Her audience stared at her in silence and Thranduil cleared his throat, "Well, that certainly was an . . . . . . interesting tale, to say the least."  
  
Tala rolled her eyes at Nerina. "You just had to tell the Phineas Gage story at the breakfast table, didn't you?"  
  
"Well, I couldn't think of anything else to tell and you weren't helping."  
  
"I don't help people whose idea of a wakeup call is screaming like a banshee!"  
  
Things could have gotten ugly, had Thranduil not intervened and suggested that Gandalf and Legolas take the two ladies on a tour of the castle.  
  
"Great idea!" cheered Nerina. "Come on stud-muffin, you can be my escort," she winked at Gandalf as she stood. Tala rolled her eyes.  
  
"Of course, Lady Nerina," Gandalf replied as he gallantly took her by the arm.  
  
"Too early," moaned Tala as Legolas pulled her out of her chair.  
  
"And as you can see, this is yet another garden," Legolas said gesturing to the flowers.  
  
"Lovely," Tala said dryly.  
  
"Oh don't mind her," Nerina giggled, "She's always grumpy in the morning."  
  
"Indeed, I can see this," Gandalf whispered in reply.  
  
"Don't think I can't hear what you're saying," growled Tala.  
  
"For the love of rum Tala, stop being such a..." Nerina paused, staring ahead for a moment before joyfully crying, "Butterfly!" She skipped happily away from the group.  
  
Legolas and Gandalf looked at each other in confusion, each mouthing the word, "Butterfly?"  
  
Tala snorted, "Oh boy, here we go."  
  
"Tala, my splendiferous most wonderful friend of friends, come frolic and help me chase this butterfly!"  
  
Tala rolled her eyes at Legolas, as if to say 'See what I put up with?' before skipping unenthusiastically after her friend.  
  
Gandalf and Legolas watched in amusement as the two chased a blue butterfly around the garden. When they neared the small pond at the center of the garden, the butterfly fluttered off. Laughing cheerfully, Nerina grabbed Tala's hands and both closed their eyes and began to twirl around in circles.  
  
"So, when do we stop twirling?" shouted Tala.  
  
Nerina cackled and shouted, "Never!"  
  
Then something rather strange happened. As the two continued to twirl, unbeknownst to them, their feet left the ground and they slowly floated upwards over the pond.  
  
Gandalf and Legolas stared in open-mouthed amazement before Legolas shouted, "What in the name of Valar are you two doing?"  
  
Tala sneered slightly and opened her eyes, "What does it look like we're..." her voice faltered. "Umm...Rina..."  
  
"Yes?" Nerina asked dreamily.  
  
"Open your eyes!"  
  
Nerina snapped out of her peaceful reverie and opened her eyes. As she stared in front of her, she frowned...'Hadn't that tree been taller a minute ago?' Then, sucking in a deep breath, she looked down.  
  
Gandalf and Legolas both covered their ears as she released a blood- curdling scream.  
  
"Rina, would you please chill!" Tala implored after recovering from the noise.  
  
Nerina sniffed, "I don't like heights."  
  
Tala sighed, "I know you don't. Well then, aren't you two going to help us?"  
  
"Just stay where you are!" called Gandalf.  
  
"Oh, now there's some good advice," grumbled Nerina. "You're a wizard! Shouldn't you be able to clap your hands and say 'Down?'"  
  
Gandalf scowled at her and then in a mimicking fashion, clapped his hands together and shouted "Down!"  
  
Tala and Nerina shrieked as they plummeted downward, landing with a great splash in the pond. Tala came up sputtering and glared evilly at the frog that was currently sitting on her knee. "Look, I dream about meeting my Prince Charming like every normal girl, but I'm definitely not in the mood right now!" The frog stared back at her blankly and croaked.  
  
"Alright, that's it frog, you asked for it....Nerina what are you doing?"  
  
Nerina was lying back in the water with a slightly dazed look on her face as she trailed her fingers through the water. "The flowers are quite beautiful, are they not?"  
  
Tala raised her eyebrow, "Yeah, sure they are."  
  
"I would give you some violets, but they all withered away when my father died."  
  
Tala rolled her eyes, "Okay. Nerina, you can play water nymph or Ophelia or whatever the heck you're doing later. In the mean time, please get up."  
  
Nerina shook herself out of her daze and blushed slightly, "Oops. Silly me."  
  
As they rose from the water, they noticed Gandalf and Legolas trying (and not really succeeding) to avoid looking at them. Tala snorted slightly, "Apparently they've never witnessed a wet T-shirt contest."  
  
They ignored the men as they walked by, suitably miffed at Gandalf's method of removing them from the air.   
  
"Did I mention that I hate wet clothing?" asked Tala.  
  
Nerina nodded, "Yeah, we better get out of these clothes before we catch something," she said in a slightly raised voice.  
  
Tala rolled her eyes, "If you don't watch yourself, 'Rina, you're going to catch a nine month cold."  
  
Nerina stuck out her tongue, "I'll be careful Tala. Just be sure that you practice what you preach."  
  
"What are you talking about?"  
  
Nerina lowered her voice and started speaking in Spanish, "Don't think I don't notice the way you've been looking at Blondie."  
  
Tala sighed, "And how have I been looking at him?"  
  
"It's the same look you get when we were fighting the other day. You love the fight, but it's no good without a worthy adversary, is it?"  
  
Tala laughed, "And Prince Pretty Hair is a worthy adversary? I think that fall may have caused some serious brain damage, 'Rina."  
  
Nerina smiled, "Well, at least I'm not in denial!"  
  
"No, you look a Mr. White like he's a bottle of rum."  
  
Nerina winked, "Nice simile . . . . . . Men and rum . . . . . . they both improve with age."  
  
"You are twisted. And I'm not in denial."  
  
"Whatever you say, Tala dear, whatever you say."  
  
Legolas looked curiously at Gandalf, "Can you understand what they're saying?"  
  
Gandalf shook his head, "No, I've never heard that language before. Perhaps I could persuade Lady Nerina to teach it to me."  
  
"Do you know what caused them to start levitating?"  
  
"I can't be sure yet, but I think there may be more to these women than meets the eye."  
  
"More than two lunatic carousers, you mean?"  
  
Gandalf nodded as he stared thoughtfully at the two women. "Yes, much more."  
  
Nerina and Tala found their rooms again, and headed straight for their respective bathrooms. After luxuriating in the large bath tubs and thoroughly scrubbing off all the pond muck, Tala went and knocked on Nerina's door, wrapped in just her towel.  
  
"Hey, 'Rina, what are we supposed to change into? We used up our emergency party supply already, and my pants won't be able to be worn for a while...if ever," she concluded with a despairing look toward her leather pants...her favorite pair. She growled under her breath at the thought of the men who caused it to happen . . . . . . ooo, were they gonna pay.  
  
She was wrenched from her thoughts of mayhem and vengeance when Nerina opened the door...clad in a robe that was unlike any Tala had seen (and she had seen a few . . . . . . as she was partial to night clothes . . . . . . hehe). Floor length and with a modest neckline, as well as the seemingly ever-present belt, it was a deep red, but the material was finer than any silk that she had ever seen.   
  
Nerina just grinned at the look on Tala's face, and the grin widened when she realized Tala stood in nothing but a towel. For one second, she thought of a few evil plots, but decided to be merciful at this point in time. Instead, she stepped around Tala and headed toward a small drawer in a cabinet on one wall. Tala just watched as she opened the drawer and withdrew a long piece of material.   
  
"My dear friend, this is a robe, elvish style," Nerina said jauntily, holding it between her hands to show her friend.  
  
Tala eyed the emerald material, and with raised brow, inquired innocently, "It is?"  
  
Nerina smirked and nodded. Tala sighed, and then walked over and took it from her friend. Stepping behind a dressing screen decorated with stylized birds, she tossed it on and belted it closed. She stepped back out, but noticed Nerina was no where in sight. Grabbing a glass and filling it with water from the sink and drinking it as she went in search of her friend, she walked through both bathrooms and found Nerina looking out of her balcony. She went over to her, and they both enjoyed the view for a few seconds.  
  
Then a shout drew their attention. Looking straight down, they discovered a busy stable yard, and noticed that several stable hands were looking up at them. Nerina giggled and leaned over, and using a voice that still managed to sound smoky even though she was practically shouting, called, "Hey there, cuties."  
  
Tala cracked up as the men below grinned widely (almost stupidly) and waved back feebly while Nerina giggled again. However, before this fun discourse could go any further, Legolas stepped into the stable yard. After looking at the now seemingly hypnotized hands, he followed their gaze and made out the figures of the two strange creatures in their charge. He stood stunned for a moment, then turned red when he realized what they were wearing. But before he could move, Tala got a very mischievous look on her face, and looking from her friend to the glass in her hand, she upended the glass right over where Legolas was. A few seconds later, they heard an angry and surprised shout, and looking down, saw a wet Legolas glaring up at them. Tala waved as all the men in the yard burst into laughter. Legolas swiped some of the water off and strode from the yard after yelling for the laughing elves to get back to work.  
  
"Uh o...we are in trouble," Tala said, not in the least bit sorry or worried. "Prude boy is going to come and ruin the fun."  
  
Nerina laughed, but they both stepped away from the balcony and took innocent poses on the couch. A few minutes later, they heard a knock at the door, and Nerina called regally, "Come in."  
  
They heard the door attempt to open, and then a muffled voice that sounded very much like a disgruntled Legolas say, "It is locked."  
  
"O my goodness! Is it really? So sorry," Tala called innocently. "I suppose you'll just have to return later," she called as Nerina stifled her laughter with her hands.  
  
However, the laughter died when they heard the lock click and saw not only an ever so slightly angry wet blonde elf step through the doorway, but an ever so slightly mad white wizard.  
  
Nerina pouted, "Now you promised to never open our door again," at the same time she restrained Tala from throwing a very pretty looking book at them.  
  
"We did not," Gandalf said, even as Nerina nodded and Tala then did. He wrinkled his brow, but then said with a wave of his hands, "Well, no matter. Your conduct has nulled the agreement for the moment. And why are you not dressed?"  
  
After Nerina and Tala closed their mouths after their jaws had dropped at his "conduct" implication, Tala said, "We don't have anything but these robes to wear at the moment. Everything else is dirty, mainly through YOUR 'help'." She said the last with a glare.  
  
"Fine, but you should not have been soliciting men from your balcony clad in nothing but robes," Legolas practically shouted.  
  
"SOLICITNG?!?! You JERK!! How could you be so insufferably rude?! We have done nothing wrong! It is not our fault that Gandalf dumped us in a pond and we were left with nothing but robes. And it certainly not our fault that the men . . . . . . or elves . . . . . . or whatever, have never seen women before!" At this point, Tala was shouting, Nerina had her hands over her ears and was glaring at the males, Gandalf had taken a step back, and Legolas had turned red, first with embarrassment and then with anger.  
  
But before he could retort, there was a knock on the door, one that was both loud and hesitant at the same time. Nerina said "Come in" very curtly, and the door opened to reveal a female elf, followed by two others, and each had bundles in their arms.   
  
The first spoke, "May we enter, My Lady?"  
  
Nerina nodded, and the three filed in, eyeing everyone warily, and deposited the bundles in the chairs and couch of the sitting area. The first spoke again, "We have brought yards of fabric and tools for sewing by order of his majesty. Umm . . . . . . we'll go now, call us if we are needed."  
  
"That will be fine, thank you very much," Nerina said with a smile, her eyes lighting up at the sight of the fabric. Even Tala grinned a little at all the choices now placed on the sitting area of Nerina's room.  
  
The ladies left, or more like fled, and Nerina pointed to the door, saying to the two men, "Get out now and if you pull that lock trick again, you will not like the consequences. Do not return unless we ask. Now, you are not welcome."  
  
They were about to protest, but walked out angrily when the women turned their backs on them.  
  
********  
  
Author's Note: In case you all were wondering what in the heck Nerina was talking about with the whole 'Sad but true tale of Phineas Gage,' we decided to post the tale for you to read! :)  
  
Phineas Gage was a young railroad construction supervisor in the Rutland and Burland Railroad site, in Vermont. In September 1848, while preparing a powder charge for blasting a rock, he inadvertently tamped a steel rod into the hole. The ensuing explosion projected the tamping rod, with 2.5 cm of diameter and more than one meter of length against his skull, at a high speed. The rod entered his head through his left cheek, destroyed his eye, traversed the frontal part of the brain, and left the top of the skull at the other side. Gage lost consciousness immediately and started to have convulsions. However, he recovered conscience moments later, and was taken to a local doctor, Jonh Harlow, who took care of him. Amazingly, he was talking and could walk. He lost a lot of blood, but after a bout with infection, he not only survived to the ghastly lesion, but recovered well, too.  
  
Months later, however, Gage began to have startling changes in personality in mood. He became extravagant and anti-social, a full mouth and a liar with bad manners, and could no longer hold a job or plan his future. "Gage was no longer Gage", said his friends of him. He died in 1861, thirteen years after the accident, penniless and epileptic, and no autopsy was performed on his brain.  
  
And that's it! Yay! R/R please and thanx in the form of ice cream to all that did review! With sprinkles! And Choco sauce! And whipped cream! And what ever else u want! :D 


	6. Chapter Six

Disclaimer: No, we don't own the two males leads of our story, or some of the supporting characters . . . . . . but we do own everyone else! *confetti*  
  
Thank you with sugar and cherries and sprinkles and every other lil topping you want to our reviewers! You all are wonderful and we love the input. Onward, to the story!  
  
**************************  
  
"Stupid . . . . . . difficult . . . . . . argh . . . . . . damn fabric!" Tala finally proclaimed after several hours. Ever since the delightful row between the males and ladies, the women had been busy. After first examining the fabrics, they had measured each other and traced patterns onto the fabrics . . . . . . their own they created in their heads (boy, was the Elven court in for some surprises *snicker*). They divided the work- Tala cutting and Nerina doing the actual sewing . . . . . . that way the clothes would stay together and come out right. (Good thing . . . . . . the last thing Tala had sewn had been a pillow . . . . . . let's just say it was a loooong time ago and it needed repair every now and then) "How DO they cut this without having it go to tatters?!?!" Tala asked exasperatedly, throwing her hands up in disgust at the fabric in her lap.  
  
Nerina looked up from her sewing and laughed, "They probably have more patience and better scissors." Looking back down at her work, she knotted the thread, bit the end, and held up the now completed shirt. "Ta da! Now we each have one complete outfit!" she exulted as she threw the purple shirt onto the pile (small pile) of completed clothes, which held one pair of jeans (sort of . . . . . . they were made of some tough blue material that resembled denim), a black shirt, and a skirt made of tan fabric that Nerina declared 'felt like it weighted nothing at all!'. There were also certain . . . . . . unmentionables . . . . . . but they will remain unmentioned.  
  
Tala clapped her hands happily, at the same time adding, "Great, just another sixty hours and our wardrobes will be complete." Nerina groaned, and Tala added evilly, "Good thing you have a knack for sewing and can do one or two pieces an hour."  
  
Nerina simply tossed a bolt of fabric at her, adding haughtily over the laughter, "Get back to work, Mz. Scissor Hands!"  
  
*ooo . . . . . . time elapsement . . . . . . think 70s waves across the screen and giant letters saying THREE HOURS LATER...*  
  
"Can we take a break? I'm starved," Tala said imploringly, pausing in her cutting.  
  
Nerina kept sewing, but shook her head while saying, "You are always hungry. Just keep working. WE should be able to survive a while longer . . . . . . especially with these new clothes."  
  
Tala sighed but nodded, and both women eyed the growing stack of clothes.  
  
*Da da da! Scene Change!!*  
  
"Gandalf, Legolas, where are Ladies Nerina and Tala?" Thranduil asked again. He was beginning to see a pattern in his recent conversations with his advisor and son. With a trace of amusement he also asked, "Are they tired again? Not hungry, perhaps?"  
  
Gandalf cleared his throat, carefully considering what to say while Legolas refused to look up from where he was staring into his wine glass with an expression of mixed anger and frustration. 'Doesn't he know the ears make it a little hard for him to pretend he didn't hear?' Gandalf thought even as he scrambled to answer the king. "Well, my friend, they discovered they had nothing to wear and declined to come down." Even as Gandalf winced at the lame excuse, he thought he heard Legolas groan.  
  
The Elven King simply raised a brow. "Then they shall find what I sent them most useful, although I can't understand why no spare attire could be found," he said, subtly scolding Legolas, and in turn, Gandalf.  
  
Both cringed a bit and nodded apologetically.  
  
"No matter, I suppose, for NOW," Thranduil concluded firmly, all the while thoroughly enjoying the discomfort of the two. He turned around to the footman behind him, and asked that a tray be taken to the ladies. The footman nodded, and after he left to relay the message to the kitchens, Thranduil once again turned upon the wizard and prince. "Tell me what happened in the garden."  
  
Legolas and Gandalf started and looked up in surprise. They looked around. As it was fairly late and they were in the informal dining hall with no other diners, they nodded, and broke into a discussion on the most unusual occurrence.  
  
***  
  
A knock sounded on the door, and Nerina said warily, "Who is it?"  
  
"Uthaniel, my lady. I bear a tray sent by the king," called a strong male voice.  
  
Both women jumped up and raced to the door. Nerina pulled it open, Tala grabbed the tray, and with a swift "Thanks" from both women, Uthaniel found the door shut and locked firmly in his face.  
  
***  
  
The next day, as Gandalf and Legolas sat studying old tomes in the vast palace library, a thought occurred to Legolas (a miracle, to be sure . . . . . . jk! jk!).  
  
"Gandalf, have you heard from our charges at all today? I mean, at ALL? Messenger, gossip . . . . . . themselves?" Legolas asked slowly. "It is almost sunset, and I have heard nothing."  
  
Gandalf thought for a moment, then shook his head. "I cannot say that I have."  
  
"Is that a good thing . . . . . . or a very bad thing?" Legolas asked warily.  
  
"Now that you mention it, it may be wise to check on them. They are in our charge, and I think your father likes them."  
  
"I was afraid you would say that . . . . . . "  
  
They quickly exited the library and headed for the guest wing. As they neared, Legolas commented, "I hear no one moving."  
  
Gandalf began to worry, and even Legolas started to feel a bit worried. Since they had fought the day before, the males had avoided the rooms of the women as if they were in quarantine. They reached Nerina's door, and paused in opening it, as they had been threatened if they ever did again. Taking a deep breath, Gandalf pushed, but found it locked. Legolas swiftly strode to Tala's, but found it locked as well. Gritting his teeth in frustration and a little bit of fear, Gandalf performed the same cantrip on Nerina's lock that had caused it to open before. He then slowly pushed the door open, and both males stood shocked at the sight that greeted them.  
  
Bolts of fabric were everywhere. No surface was uncovered. Actually, Nerina's room . . . . . . or what they thought was Nerina's room, looked like a rainbow had exploded. However, after getting over the color shock, they realized something else. There were no women present.  
  
With a swift look at his friend, Legolas walked into the bathrooms. He found them empty, and also found Tala's room vacant. He returned, shaking his head at Gandalf's questioning look, and made for the door to the hall, intent upon tracking down the two. Then he froze, almost causing Gandalf to run into him, his ears detecting a faint sound. He turned back and faced the room, and crept towards the bed.  
  
He reached the edge and saw one of the piles of fabric shift. He reached out and gingerly lifted up a yellow piece of material that looked something like a shirt. He found part of a face, and lifting some light blue material, revealed all of Tala's face. He turned and tossed a grin at Gandalf, who turned to examine the piles in search of Nerina. Legolas then said softly, "Wake up, Tala."  
  
He chuckled lightly when his only response was a grumble that sounded something like "shgoawy." He then gently shook her shoulder, saying, "Wake up."  
  
A hand came flying up, accompanied by a few garments, and he was hit along his jaw by the hand and felt the clothes hit him. He was knocked back in surprise, and ended up giving a surprised shout at the same time.  
  
Nerina looked to her bed in surprise as Gandalf pulled her from the mound of fabric she had been under on the couch. She watched as Tala sat bolt upright, looking around wildly. Nerina smothered a giggle as she saw her friend's eyes widen as they fixed on the Prince, who was now rubbing his jaw, and immediately adopted a contrite look. Nerina did giggle when Tala automatically took his hand away from his face and turned his chin so she could see the now forming red spot. Both Gandalf and Nerina laughed outright at Legolas's surprised look, and the laughter awoke the two to what Tala was doing. She immediately let go and jumped off the bed . . . . . . away from Legolas. Nerina also realized the wizard had not yet let go of her hand, but decided not to protest. Instead she turned to him, ignoring the two by the bed. "What are you doing here? As I remember, you both were ever so slightly forbidden to return . . . . . . "  
  
Gandalf looked quite guilty and disgruntled, and the feeling increased when Tala added, "And how did you get in the 'locked' room?"  
  
"We . . . . . . ah . . . . . . were checking on you. We had not heard from you all day and-"  
  
"Wait, wait . . . . . . back up. What do you mean, ALL DAY?" Tala asked.  
  
"We mean that it is about an hour until the evening meal now, and we had heard nothing all day," Legolas answered for Gandalf slowly, making sure his jaw was okay.  
  
"We slept a whole day?" Nerina inquired, aghast.  
  
"Yes, indeed you did my dear," Gandalf said gently, patting her hand.  
  
Both women groaned and as Tala began to move around picking up clothing, Nerina carefully disengaged her hand from Gandalf's to help, though she was saddened at the feeling of letting go.  
  
Gandalf regretted that she let go, wishing it had lasted longer, but also bent to help straighten the room. Legolas followed suit, and as he picked up a red, lacy looking cloth, said, "What is all this?"  
  
"A wardrobe," Tala said shortly as she snatched it from his hand.  
  
"Wardrobe?!" both males said. Gandalf continued, "This . . . . . . all of THIS . . . . . . is a wardrobe? You made all of this clothing in a day?!"  
  
Tala laughed as Nerina said with a grin, "It's not all clothes . . . . . . just most of it. Tala and I make a good team."  
  
Both the wizard-who-has-learned-a-lot and the prince-who-has-seen-a-lot looked at their unusual guests with new respect.  
  
They all continued straightening the room, and when Nerina decided her room was satisfactory (which is not easy to achieve), Tala carted her pile of clothes into her room via the bathrooms and the remaining three sat down, Legolas in a chair, Gandalf and Nerina on the couch . . . . . . just a little too close. Nerina picked up a glass of water that had somehow survived the fabric nuclear bomb and remembering, turned to Legolas and asked, "Are you still mad?"  
  
He blinked, but shook his head. "No, it was actually slightly amusing but it will be a long time before I regain respect from the stable hands," he concluded with a wry smile.  
  
Gandalf and Nerina laughed. After the laughter died down, Gandalf looked toward the door, "Where is Tala? I have some things I would like to discuss with you two." He turned his blue eyes to Nerina's.  
  
Nerina froze, enchanted by his eyes, and decided she was perfectly happy in forgetting his question.  
  
Legolas rolled his own blue eyes and coughed slightly. The two seemed to break from their trance, and Nerina thought quickly, finally saying smartly, "I have no idea."  
  
At Legolas's smothered chuckle, she elaborated with, "She usually just dumps clothes wherever." Then with an angelic smile yet demonic gaze aimed at Legolas, she added, "Why don't you go check on her?"  
  
Legolas gave her a sour look, but rose to do as she asked while Gandalf smothered a chuckle of his own.  
  
As Legolas passed through the bathroom door, Nerina thought, 'Finally, Mr. Wizard is right where I want him'. With a smile that bordered on predatory, she returned her gaze to the present person that was her fascination.  
  
***  
  
Legolas walked quietly into Tala's room and smiled widely at the sight that greeted him. The mound of clothes was thrown haphazardly onto the couch, just as Nerina had predicted, but Tala was stretched out over her bed, seemingly asleep. He approached cautiously, his jaw (and pride) advising him. He reached the bed and stood looking down at the sleeping female for a few moments. Curled on her side, her hair fanned out behind her, and still clad in the robe, she looked innocent, and even . . . . . . gentle. 'Right', Legolas thought. Very carefully he reached out and touched her shoulder. Her green eyes opened but held their sleep clouded glaze for a moment. She seemed to realize who it was, and for the second time sat up quickly. Her eyes widened slightly as a thought occurred to her. "I didn't hit you again, did I?"  
  
Legolas started, for he had been entranced by the sleepy look and wild hair. He recovered and shook his head. She sighed in relief and stood, walking to the bathroom. Legolas watched her go, again taken in by the sight of her hair. Very few elves had short hair, but hers was even longer than Nerina's. Reaching just an inch or two past her waist, it fell in a cascade of brown, red, and just a hint of gold. Just as he started to wonder at his own fascination, she returned, carrying what turned out to be a small towel thoroughly doused in cold water. She took his hand, put the towel in it, then had him hold it against his jaw. She moved away, tearing herself away from the surprised look in his eyes.  
  
"Sorry about that . . . . . . it's a reflex," she said as she made her way toward the mound of new clothing. "Not like you didn't deserve it, but still." Not giving him a chance to respond, she kept on chattering. "Jeez, I can see it's going to be hard to get any good amount of sleep here. O well . . . . . . perhaps I could booby-trap a few things . . . . . . hmm . . . . . ."  
  
She paused, and Legolas did not like the sound of "booby-trap", but just as he opened his mouth to comment, she switched subjects. "When is breakfast . . . . . . or dinner . . . . . . whatever, I'm starved."  
  
Legolas looked out the window. "I believe it just started."  
  
At her stricken look, he grinned, but said reassuringly, "Don't worry, we can send for food from the kitchens, as in the past two nights."  
  
She visibly relaxed and brightened at that option, and gleefully skipped to her friend's door, yelling loud enough to make Legolas wince, "Hey, 'Rina! We get to order room service!" This was quickly followed by a smug and not in the least sorry, "Ho! So 'sorry'! Was I interrupting something?"  
  
He reached the door just in time to see Gandalf . . . . . . Legolas blinked . . . . . . no, his eyes did not deceive him . . . . . . Gandalf was blushing! He quickly looked at Nerina, but she just looked at him innocently. Tala snorted and smirked beside him. The she continued with her original message.  
  
"We get to eat! Prince Boy is going to get some great food from the kitchens for us!"  
  
"Wonderful idea! I will help him!" Gandalf said, quickly standing and ushering the Prince out the door.  
  
As is shut with a light bang, Tala looked at her friend with a raised eyebrow, and both women burst into laughter.  
  
***  
  
After a short while, the two had become thoroughly bored, and decided to play improv...  
  
***  
  
King Thranduil looked around the informal dining room as he entered, noticing that not only were the ladies missing, AGAIN, but so were his son and friend. He turned to the footman placing dished on the table and asked his favorite question, "Where are our guests? And for that matter, where is my son, and Gandalf?"  
  
The footman grinned, "I believe they are all dining in the twin rooms. At least that is what the Prince and Wizard said when they collected a few trays from the kitchens. That, and they were keeping the ladies, 'who are very tired', company."  
  
Thranduil simply laughed, thoroughly pleased with his new guests and the chaos they were bringing to Mirkwood.  
  
***  
  
"So, just what was going on in Nerina's room?" Legolas asked slyly as the two carried trays back to Nerina's room.  
  
Gandalf stuttered for a moment, but concluded with, "None of your business, pup."  
  
Legolas just laughed as they reached the door, but his knock was halted by the conversation his ears picked up from the other side. Nerina's voice carried only softly through the door, but his ears heard it. Pressing his ears to the door and motioning Gandalf to silence, he listened intently to the conversation on the other side of the door.  
  
"You know, I really did like that guy in Scotland," her voice adopted a pout, "wish you hadn't killed him."  
  
"Yeah, well, you killed my pet boy in Rome, so now we're even," Tala replied lazily.  
  
Now, let's just say our dear Prince was in one hell of a case of shock.  
  
"So, when do you think Mr. Wizard and Blonde Boy will be back with food?" Nerina asked.  
  
Now this brought Legolas back to the present, and standing straight again, he knocked on the door. Ignoring the questioning look of Gandalf, he smiled brightly when the door opened.  
  
"Hello again! Thanks for knocking," Nerina said with a warm smile as she opened the door. She ushered the two in, and then followed them over to the sitting area where Tala already reclined on the couch. Swatting at Tala's feet, Nerina said, "Move your feet off my couch you space hog."  
  
Tala growled but did as ordered, reaching for the food the males set on the table. As she happily munched on a biscuit, Nerina continued, "Yes, but you had removed the one I had in Madrid."  
  
Tala snorted, and swallowing said, "Well, he was a sleaze and you had gotten rid of his brother . . . . . . who was mine."  
  
At this point, Legolas choked, and Gandalf let his fork stop halfway to his mouth. Nerina just stuck her tongue out at Tala, but then looked at the Prince and Wizard, both of whom had gone motionless and silent. She looked at them innocently, and said, "What?"  
  
Legolas and Gandalf gulped. Tala laughed, "I do believe they are disturbed by our conversation."  
  
Nerina looked at them thoughtfully, "I do believe you're right. Perhaps we should explain-"  
  
"What is there to explain? You have apparently, ah . . . . . . um . . . . . . removed certain . . . . . . acquaintances . . . . . . andIthinkwewilljustbegoingnow," Gandalf concluded on a rush, and both males stood.  
  
When this was met by nothing but great peals of laughter from the women, they concluded the women were terribly insane.  
  
"No, no," Tala gasped, and wiping tears from her eyes, motioned to their vacated chairs, "sit down, we will explain." Nerina nodded still laughing.  
  
The two resumed their seats, but still looked ready to bolt. With a last gasping laugh, Tala said, "It's just a game."  
  
At their confused look, Nerina went off into another laughing fit, and Tala quickly tamped down her mirth and said, "It's a game we play when we are bored. WE think up an imaginary situation, and create a conversation around it. It's quite fun." Nerina nodded in agreement, still giggling.  
  
"So . . . . . . it is just a game?" Legolas said slowly.  
  
Both ladies nodded, smiling at the males, quite pleased with themselves. Gandalf glanced at Legolas and after sharing a look where they agreed the women were insane, they shrugged and continued to eat.  
  
The women, terribly amused, also again began to eat. After they were done, everyone sat back. After staring at the ceiling for a minute, Tala yawned, and said, "I'm going to bed now" as she stretched.  
  
"But . . . . . . you just woke up . . . . . . twice," Legolas said, with a look that obviously said she was crazy.  
  
She glared at him, "So? I didn't 'sleep' a whole lot, and I'm tired, so I'm going to sleep."  
  
Nerina poked her, "What? You usually get your second wind now! Come on, you know you want to do something."  
  
Tala swatted her arm, "Not after staying up as much as we did. 'Sides, sleep now, make mayhem tomorrow." She stood and walked to her room, ignoring the exclamations of "Mayhem?!", and at the bathroom door, spun and called, "Goodnight" innocently and waved.  
  
Nerina laughed, but then agreed with her idea. She got the two males out of her room, sent the trays with them (hehe) and dousing the candles, went to bed. 


	7. Chapter Seven

**Disclaimer and general ranting:**

Tala: First and foremost, we humbly beg everyone's pardon for not posting . . . . . . and will happily provide excuses if so desired.

Cayla: Damn right you will beg them for forgiveness!!! It's been forever!!!

Nerina: (glares) Cayla is our beta . . . . . . and she is a not very nice task master. . . . . .

Tala: What do you mean _not very nice_?! She's damn persistent and scary (whispers) she is the local kung fu master . . . . . . so she can be real scary . . . . . .

Cayla: Excuse me!! Get on with it!!

Nerina: Alright, alright, sheesh . . . . . . (adopts monotone) We, the party of the first part, the authors, do not own anything that is copyrighted by the party of the second part, the Tolkein foundation or whatever, so don't sue! (aside) and I'm workin on the getting Gandalf drunk part(wink)

Tala: Yeah, we're poor anyways so it would be a waster of time . . . . . .

Cayla: Yeah yeah, shut up and on with the chapter!

* * *

Tala slowly awoke to the sound of a bird. At any other time, she would have thought the bird's song quite beautiful, but not in the morning when she was in the middle of a very **fun** dream, about . . . . . . gorgeous blue eyes and a warrior's body. She quickly sat up and shoved the memory of the dream away. 'Bad thoughts, bad thoughts. But then again, his body is absolutely hott! I mean-AHH!! Stop! What am I thinking?' covering her face with her hands she sighed, and completely pissed at the bird and herself, yelled, "SHUT UP!" to no one in particular. 

The bird, being exceedingly smart, flew away, and Tala felt much better. She flopped back down onto her pillows, but after a few minutes she finally huffed something that sounded suspiciously like 'shit' and got out of bed.

She shuffled over to the bathroom, and after finishing in there, went and rummaged in the closet and dresser. She pulled out black pants and a dark green shirt and then tied her hair back in her customary braid. Taking a last glance in the mirror, she nodded and slowly made her way over to Nerina's room.

"Hey, 'Rina. You awake-" her voice drifted into nothing when she noticed that Nerina's room was empty. "Great, she's abandoned me already. O well, maybe I can detain a nice footman and get breakfast."

She stepped out of the rooms, and for once finding no one about, she made her way down the halls, searching for food and Nerina. She picked up the sounds of clanging as she passed a passageway, and now following her ears and nose, came to a huge kitchen. It was IMMENSE.

Herbs hung from the ceiling, and large windows flooded it with light. The smell of bread and spices gave the room a comfortable feeling. At this point, there were only two people in there, two Elven women. They turned as she stepped in, and immediately one grabbed a plate and a few food items while the other grabbed her arm and led her to a small table in a corner. She was quite surprised, but didn't complain as the two 'forced' her to eat a variety of breakfast pastries after pushing her onto a stool on a bar like counter. They chatted as they went back to work, introducing themselves as Larissa and Vanida.

"You must try this," urged Vanida, giving Tala a sample of some sort of fruit concoction. She drank, and found a very pleasing blend of fruits and a sweetness she couldn't quite place. She nodded as she drank in response to the "Is it good?" question.

Larissa snickered at the blissful expression on Tala's face after she put the cup down, and then asked, "Do you cook, my lady?"

"Tala, please. And yes, it is tons of fun. And do you all have any chocolate somewhere? It's been days and I'm suffering withdrawal." At their confused looks, she just sighed and said dejectedly, "Guess not."

But they didn't let the subject go, and started to questioning her about it. They had just reached the myths and legends of chocolate, mainly its aphrodisiac qualities, when Prince boy decided to walk in. He gave them strange looks, having only caught part of the conversation, and gave them a weak smile when they burst into laughter.

"Hiya, Blondie. Have you seen Nerina?" Tala asked with a little wave.

Legolas ignored the name, and shook his head. "No, I was actually coming to find Gandalf. I haven't seen him this morning either."

Tala grinned and winked at the two elven women. "They are probably together . . . . . . experimenting!" The women broke into peals of laughter, and with a long suffering groan Legolas pulled Tala out of the kitchen. She waved amidst the laughter and both women called that she should return soon. She nodded, and waved one last time as she was pulled out.

"I like you too and everything, Highness, but do you think I could have my arm back now?" Tala asked as they walked down a hallway.

"Of course, my apologies," Legoals said as he quickly let go.

"So, what are you gonna do today, Princey?"

"Must you use all the silly names?" Legolas asked exasperatedly.

She thought about it, and answered with a very serious, "Yes."

He sighed, and said as they reached door and he said, "This is Gandalf's room. We'll try here and then continue if he's not here."

Tala knocked on the door and raised an eyebrow at Legolas when no one

answered.

"Perhaps the storeroom and cannot hear the knock," he offered.

"Well we might as well check," she said as she opened the door. "I mean before we call for a search party we should at least check his quarters."

Tala paused to look around Gandalf's quarters and her jaw dropped in

disbelief. "I never pictured Gandalf to be a pack rat," she mused aloud.

Legolas nodded, "What he lacks in organization, he more than makes up

for in brilliance."

"Why does he need this?" she asked, holding up what appeared to be the

skull of a Nazgul.

Legolas shuddered, "I haven't the slightest idea."

Tala was about to ask another question about the décor when they heard a noise coming from the doorway across the room.

Legolas held a finger up to his lips and motioned for her to follow him.

As they approached they heard Gandalf speak. "You're mad if you think this position will work, Nerina. It's physically impossible!"

The two heard a chuckle from what sounded like Nerina. "Oh it will work, trust me. I did this all the time with the boys back home. Here, it works better if I arch my back."

"Well, if you're sure you're comfortable."

"Oh I am," she said in a hurried tone. "Please do it quickly. I don't think I can hold it much longer."

By this point Legolas was staring aghast at the doorway and Tala was shaking her head in disbelief and mouthing the words "So wrong."

Deciding that they'd heard enough, Legolas and Tala attempted to beat a fast retreat, but in the process Tala knocked a rather heavy tome off of a nearby table.

"What was that?" they heard Nerina ask.

"I can't be sure," he replied.

After a moment Nerina called out, "Friend or foe?"

"Two friends who wouldn't mind terribly if they happened to go deaf after what they just heard," Tala said sarcastically.

"Well then come in here," Nerina shouted with a laugh.

Legolas and Tala looked at each other worriedly before going into the store room.

"Were you two eavesdropping?" Nerina asked in a playful tone from her position on the floor.

"Li'l bit," Tala said with a nod.

Legolas cleared his throat, "We were trying to find you."

"Well mission accomplished. I've been here playing Twister with Gandalf. It was fun, wasn't it Gandalf?"

"It was very amusing," he said with a smile.

"Well that's lovely," Tala said shortly, "But if you don't mind I need to deprive you of your companion for awhile, Gandalf."

"When can I see you again Nerina?" he asked with an imploring look.

She smiled, "Soon. We'll play Twister again sometime, ok?"

He nodded, "I look forward to it."

Tala shuffled her feet and glared at Nerina, in hopes of ending this little tête-à-tête, an attempt, which was noticed and, of course, ignored by Nerina. Not to be put off quite so easily, Tala made a move to grab her friend and drag her from the room. Legolas, sensing a conflict, attempted to diffuse the situation by tossing Tala over his shoulder and carrying her out of the room.

Naturally, pandemonium ensued and Tala while wriggling about, let forth a string of curse words that even had Nerina blushing.

"I suppose we should follow them," Gandalf mused.

Nerina sighed, "Must we? They're two mature adults, I'm sure they can take care of themselves." She paused a moment before she and Gandalf burst into laughter at that statement.

"I have an idea," Gandalf said conspiratorially.

Nerina leaned in close to him, "We ditch those two like a bad habit and run away together?"

"Perhaps not in those same terms, but yes."

She smiled as she took his offered hand, "I applaud your brilliant idea."

With that the two ran laughing out of the storeroom, past Legolas and Tala, who by this point had fought her way down and was now rubbing a very sore backside, and through the corridor.

"Well, I see where her loyalties lie," sniffed Tala as she stood up slowly, as both she and Legolas stared numbly at the backs of Nerina and Gandalf as they hurried through the arch way leading to the gardens and forest, then slowly turned to face each other.

"Wonderful. Now I'm stuck babysitting you all day," Legolas said with a slight glare.

Tala glared back, "Yeah well, you should feel sorry for me. I have to be stuck with 'you' all day!"

Legolas, being the great diplomatic person he is, just gritted his teeth and said with fists clenched at his sides, "So what do you want to do?"

Tala smirked right back. "I don't know, what do you want to do?"

"I don't know. You're the guest. What do you want to do?"

"I don't know. You're the prince. What do you want to do?"

"I don't- arg! You," the prince emphasized this with a finger pointed right in her face, "are frustrating and annoying!"

Tala pointed right back in his face. "And you are stuck up and a meaniehead!"

The prince opened his mouth to speak, but stopped and said slightly shocked, "What?! What did you just call me?"

"Meaniehead! M-E-A-N-I-E-H-E-A-D!"

"I am not!"

"Are so!"

"Am NOT!"

"Are SO!"

"AM-"

"Would you two kindly keep it down? I'm trying to concentrate on these plans," Thranduil said, sticking his head out of a room down the hall. Both Legolas and Tala blushed slightly, and with quick nods and mumbled apologies, practically ran down the hall. Thranduil chuckled to himself, quite pleased he had gotten them to stop fighting. He returned to his study, and happily went right back to what he was doing – reading a humorous play that Aragorn had sent him. (_ (_snicker) plans . . . . . . right. Thranduil's so sneaky)

As they walked down the hall, Tala asked, "Where are we going?"

Legolas glanced at her and then away, "To do what I normally do at this time of day."

"Which is what?" Tala inquired.

"Something you could never possibly understand or appreciate," Legolas said with a superior smirk.

Tala grinned, "We are going to check out the women of the Elven court? I didn't know that was a daily scheduled event for you."

Legolas practically tripped over his own feet at this, and looked at her in horror, "Certainly not!"

"Then what are we doing?" Tala asked 'innocently'. "Going to your lessons on how to treat guests?"

Legolas glared at her, "No." And then he ignored her.

By this time though they had reached the outside, and Tala was greeted with the view of elven soldiers battling on a green courtyard. Her mouth formed an "O" in surprise and her eyes widened. Then feeling quite evil, said, "Ooooo. We are here to check out _guys_. Got it. And you thought I wouldn't appreciate it."

Alright, at this point let's just say Legolas was ready to kill her, but settled for a furious "no" quickly followed by the statement of, "I think I hate you.'

Tala just smiled maddeningly at him and said sweetly, "Hate you too."

Legolas just threw his hands up in frustration and marched away, straight towards a small rack of weapons. Tala quickly followed, wondering what he was going to do. She then caught sight of the weapons, and breathed a small gasp. He turned and looked at her, wondering what had made her do that, and found her transfixed by the assortment of weapons. She lightly, and almost reverently, traced the blade of an Elven sword, then the fletching of an arrow resting in a quiver. But it was when she spied the daggers that her eyes truly lit up. Legolas smirked, "Like what you see?"

Tala quickly snatched her hand back, and looking away, nodded quickly.

"Well, that's nice. But you really shouldn't touch them. They are dangerous for one who doesn't know what to do with them," he said pompously.

Tala looked at him sharply, "What makes you think I don't?"

"You."

"And just _what_ is that supposed to mean?!" she asked, bristling in anger.

"You're a woman. That, and a clumsy human," Legolas said disdainfully.

"Ahem. But if I'm not mistaken, that person practicing over there is a woman, and I know you have seen humans fight. And I am not clumsy. But you are a jerk," she said, completely angry with him.

He, being smart as he was at that moment, snorted, "Right. You probably don't even know what to do with a blade."

Her eyebrow twitched, "O really? Care to bet on it?"

Ignoring the warning signs (and completely forgetting the previous incident in a courtyard), Mr. Smart Prince said, "Why not? I'll have you beaten in two seconds."

"Fine, what's the bet?" she said, clenching her teeth.

"Hmm . . . . . . if I win, you have behave like a true lady for a whole day and wear a dress . . . . . . all day, and the appropriate ones at the appropriate times. Morning, afternoon, and dinner."

She paled, and he grinned, "Scared, my '_lady_'?"

She growled, "No. I agree. But if I win, you have to be my personal servant for a whole day. And a NICE one."

Well, by now, they had gotten quite a bit of attention from those already in the courtyard. They all smothered laughter as the woman faced down their prince. Of course, now Legolas knew he couldn't back down and acquiesced. "Fine. Choose your weapon."

She nodded, and extended her hand. He took it and they shook. Those around them cheered, as both contestants had the same thought, 'I won't lose.'

Tala turned, and after simply saying, "Dagger" she bent down and messed with her pant leg. Alright, now everyone in the courtyard was confused. However, all was soon revealed when she straightened and held up a small dirk for everyone's viewing pleasure. They all stared, especially when she just reached behind her to the small of her back and took out another dagger, this one with a blade almost a foot long. Both weapons were works of art, complete with leather hilts, a dark blue jewel on the cross guard, and a smooth ball for the pummel. She raised a brow, and then, feeling unusually gracious, extended them for Legolas to inspect (she even did so hilt first, definitely being nice). He took them gently and examined them. The first thing he noticed was that both were perfectly balanced and while strong enough to do damage, were light enough to not give the wielder a great burden, causing the wielder to rely on speed and agility more than strength. Then he noticed the designs on the blades. The dirk was decorated with a type of coat of arms and language he did not recognize, and a dragon writhed along the blade. But it was the dagger that was a true beauty, for it had intricate designs surrounding a flying horse etched on one side and a wolf on the other. Both he and the crowd surrounding the two were struck by its beauty and appreciated it. Yet he also realized that the blades were extremely well cared for, and extremely sharp. This fact made an alarm go off in his brain, but he ignored it and gave them back. He then turned and selected two Elven daggers from the weapons rack.

Legolas turned back with the blades in hand, and looking around, nodded toward an open area. Tala followed as he led the way, and took up a stance across from him when he stopped. He raised the blade of his right hand to above his heart, while she raised hers to a vertical position in front of her face. Both nodded acknowledgement of the other, and began.

Legolas lunged forward and got the surprise of his life. She wasn't there. He quickly pivoted to find her thrusting straight up toward his mid section. He stepped back quickly, and blocked a side slash she made with the dagger in her right hand. He fell back again, reevaluating his thought on her ability. Tala smirked at his surprised and thoughtful look, and threw him a comment as she put her weight on her left foot, which was behind her. "It seems to me, Blondie, that you forgot what happened the last time I had a dagger in your vicinity."

His thoughts ran, and she saw the realization dawn in his eyes. "That's right, Princey, I had you flat on your back."

The spectators gasped, and then gasped again when he rejoined with, "But only after I had you on yours, dear lady."

Her eyes darkened at the reminder and she sprung. He stepped forward, blocking the dagger with both blades, but forgot the dirk. She brought it up to disembowel him, but in a move that would have done any contortionist credit, he rotated his body to the left to avoid it. Swiftly she removed her blades and ducked his slash aimed for her shoulder. She kicked her leg out to trip him and succeeded. He landed but automatically rolled and her blades sunk into the dirt, missing him completely. With an oath, she tore them from the ground and rolled to the side. Both jumped up and scowled at each other. This was going to take a little longer than they thought.

They circled one another, evaluating each others paces and level of energy. The prince was actually slightly surprised to find they were mostly evenly matched, and Tala was thrilled to find another person other than Nerina who was worth sparring with. Legolas attacked, and Tala blocked the blade of his left hand aimed at her hip with her dirk in her left, and then blocked his upward thrust toward her neck with the dagger in her right hand. Now they were almost nose to nose, and Legolas was surprised to find Tala's eyes gleaming with excitement. While Tala on the other hand, only had one thought, 'His eyes . . . . . are dangerous; I could fall into those eyes . . . . . . '. When this thought actually registered she quickly jumped backwards, and attacked again while Legolas scrambled to catch himself. He blocked, and with a quick flick of his wrist, amazed the crowd by knocking the dirk from her left hand. Tala was in shock, but managed to move back. She stood glaring at him while he threw her a superior smirk. She growled, and with a quick lunge of her own, knocked the dagger of his right hand from his grip. Now it was his turn to be surprised, and he stepped back. However, he forgot to block her now free left hand, and ended up with a solid punch to his ribs.

Okay, so now the crowd was just stunned as they watched both fighters stand away from each other. Tala grinned evilly. They sprang at each other again and Legolas ducked and aimed a slash towards Tala's breastbone. Tala pivoted on her toes to the left, but found she had made a very terrible mistake. She had exposed her back, and before she knew it, his hand grabbed her braid and she screamed. But he just jerked her back against his body, leveling his knife along her throat.

"Do you yield?" he panted next to her ear, his breath tickling just every so slightly.

"Never," she snarled, and in a move that left him astounded by her lack for caring if she was injured, grabbed his wrist and twisted, then stepped to the right out of his grip. She faced him, and then delivered him a knee that had him crying out in agonizing pain and left the crowd wondering if there would be future generations of the royal house. She stepped back, and he crumbled forward, and stood panting while he stayed slumped on the ground for a few moments.

"Do _you_ yield, you bastard?!" she growled, carefully moving her fingers through her hair, thoroughly pissed that he had pulled her hair. She closed her eyes, and then regretted it when she felt her legs go out from under her courtesy of Legolas, who decided to ignore the 'bastard' name calling. She rolled, and came up into a crouch and glared at him where he was crouched a few feet away. The spectators were making so much noise by now that others from the court had joined them, but both contestants ignored them. Both stood slowly and ran at each other with battle cries, and the battle began anew.

Well, the battle went on for what seemed like hours, both weaving, striking and retreating. In actuality, it was only about thirty minutes, but to them it seemed forever. At the end of that thirty or so minutes, they stood panting and glaring at each other with about six feet between them. Legolas had a cut along his ribs, left bicep, and a bloody lip from a well placed punch while Tala had a gash in her right hip, left shoulder, a forming bruise on her jaw, and a tiny knick on her hairline. By now, almost everyone in the vicinity of the courtyard had come to watch, and bets were being taken all around. Even Thranduil had shown up at some point, and was completely pleased to see his son being forced to actually work for a victory, as well as partially worried for their welfare. Nerina and Gandalf had shown up even later, and were now watching with a mixture of amusement and fear, both worrying for their friends. Of course, all were ignored by the two locked in the combat neither refused to lose.

Both stepped forward once more and, almost with a hint of desperation, attacked. Their movements were slower and a bit clumsier, and no more than two minutes later after this clash did both fighters go down when Legolas kicked Tala's feet from under her. She went down, but hooked a foot around his ankle, bringing him down as well. The crowd fell silent as neither one moved for a moment. Both lay panting, and in a last ditch attempt at winning, both raised fists and hit each other. Of course, they had no energy left, and the blows were weak, and after they connected, Tala and Legolas just laid there, heaving in oxygen and trying to muster the energy to continue. But before either could, someone shouted, "Enough!"

The crowd turned toward the voice, and the two fighters raised their heads weakly in its general direction before just letting their heads fall back to earth in exhaustion. Thranduil strode forward, and simply said, "I declare this match a draw."

Naturally, no one was going to argue with him, but someone yelled out, "How is the bet settled?" There were murmurs of agreement through the crowd.

Nerina stepped forward, having already been told the terms of the bet, and said clearly, "Tala will have to wear a dress to the banquet and be the perfect lady while Legolas will behave as the perfect escort." Both Thranduil and Gandalf nodded happily, and the two on the ground glared at her, wishing they had enough energy to hurl their remaining daggers at her. They then slowly sat up, drawing attention back to them.

"And now," Thranduil added, "I believe it is time that these warriors were taken and cleaned up and then allowed to rest. For both must be ready for tonight's banquet." And then he swept away to the castle, leaving the two 'warriors' in the care of their 'friends.'

"I am going to kill you," Tala panted as she sat glaring at Nerina.

Nerina ignored the glare, and laughed as she reached a hand out to help Tala up. "You always say that, but you know you can't live without me."

"So? I will kill you, as soon as I can move normally again," Tala groaned as she straightened. Nerina just grinned, knowing full well she wouldn't.

Legolas also got up slowly, aided by Gandalf, but also agreed with Tala's words. He shot Gandalf an angry glance, to which the wizard just smiled. Then the two fighters were led off the field and to their rooms to recuperate, something they would need if both were to survive the evening.

* * *

As/N: And that is that, for now. If you have any questions, please feel free to ask. And hopefully the next installment will be soon . . . . . . with great emphasis on the HOPEFULLY.

Now, we ask that everyone review!! Pweetty please??? Maybe??


	8. Chapter Eight

Disclaimer: We do not own all the stuff owned by the Tolkein estate…so don't sue…we're poor anyways so it'd be a waste

Look for A/N at the end

Reaching the end of the corridor after leaving her friend, Nerina could barely contain her excitement.

"Where are you taking me?" Nerina asked in a delighted whisper as Gandalf led her down a stone stairway.

He smiled and said softly, "It's a secret." He pulled what appeared to be a blindfold from his robes. "Do you trust me?" he whispered.

Nerina's eyes widened slightly, but she smiled as she replied softly, "Of course I do, Gandalf." She blushed as he held the palm of his hand gently against her cheek. She breathed in as he tied scarf around her head.

He took her hand in his and they continued down a corridor for a few minutes in silence before coming to a stop. Nerina shivered slightly from the chill of the corridor, but she found if she tilted her face upwards, she could feel a steady warm glow from above.

"Wait here a moment," Gandalf said, grasping her hand in reassurance before letting go.

Standing blind and alone, Nerina rocked back and forth on her heels. She placed her hands out in front of her and slowly turned around, feeling nothing, not even the solid comfort of a wall.

Just then she heard Gandalf's voice from above. "Can you hear me, Nerina?"

"Yes," she called back.

"Good. Now I want you to follow my instructions."

She grinned wickedly, "Do I have to call you 'Master?'"

He laughed, "You are strange sometimes. But no, you do not…at least not today."

"Okay, I'm ready," she called.

"Alright, Nerina, I want you to move forward three steps. You can put your hands in front of you if it makes you feel more secure."

She moved forward slowly, counting her steps and grasping at the air in front of her.

"Very good, now if you'll take one large step forward and move your hands in front of you, please."

As her hands reached out, Nerina started when her fingers brushed a metal bar. She smoothed her hands over it in examination and realized it was the rung of a ladder.

"Climb up," Gandalf called in amusement.

She sighed, "You're twisted, making a blindfolded person climb a ladder."

"Trust me, it's worth the climb."

Nerina found the bottom rung with her foot and slowly started to climb. She wasn't afraid, but she didn't want to tempt fate by rushing blindly. When she felt that she'd reached the top, she heard Gandalf's voice very close to her and she stretched out her hand, which he held as she climbed out and put her feet on solid ground.

She smiled as he moved behind her and placed his hands on the blindfold. "Are you ready?" he murmured.

"Yes," Nerina said, a smile playing upon her lips.

The blindfold fell away from her eyes and she gasped in delight as she stared in amazement about her. Tall oaks, lush and comforting in their stature, surrounded them. Wildflowers were abundantly scattered about them and Nerina swore she saw colors she'd never known to exist.

Nerina spun around and shook her head at Gandalf in disbelief. "You are amazing," she said softly. "This place is beautiful. Thank you for bringing me here," she murmured and lifted her hand to wipe a small tear from her eye.

Gandalf placed a finger under her chin and raised head so he could look into her eyes. "I'm happy that it pleased you." He wrapped his arm around her shoulders and drew her close before bending his head and capturing her lips in a soft, hesitant kiss.

As they parted Nerina looked at him contemplatively and before he had time to react she wrapped herself around him and pulled him down to the ground. She grinned, "You have no idea how long I've been waiting for you to do that." Nerina leaned over him, letting her hair fall in a curtain around them.

Gandalf smiled and his wandering hands discovered that Nerina was very ticklish. Using this newfound knowledge to his advantage he managed to reduce her to hysterics and reverse their positions.

She frowned, "You play dirty."

He smirked, "Does this bother you, truly?"

"That's not the point," she chuckled. "But on a different note, where are we precisely?"

"The underground tunnel we just went through leads to the forest bordering the palace," Gandalf explained.

Nerina thought about this for a moment before asking, "And do many people know about this particular spot?"

He shook his head, "I assure you it is quite secluded."

A satisfied smile passed over Nerina's face as she wrapped her arms around him, pulling him close to her, "Aren't you the clever one?"

In evidence of just how clever he truly was, Gandalf decided that his reply would be more effective if he gave his voice a rest and put his mouth to good use. And Nerina, for one, decided that afternoon that 'clever' was not a strong enough word to describe Gandalf.

Breathless with laughter, Nerina spun around wildly until she collapsed on the floor and watched as the room whirled around her. As her vision righted itself she brushed her fingers over her lips and giggled as she thought about Gandalf. Her rather lecherous thoughts were interrupted by the shout, "Damned corset!" from the next room.

She laughed, "Problems, Tala, love?" she called.

The adjoining door flew back on its hinges and Tala stalked into the room, pausing only to glare at her friend. "Oh would you get off the floor? It's bad enough that you ditched me today for Mr. Wizard, but you don't have to roll around on the floor like you've just been…tumbled." At Nerina's resulting grin, Tala closed her eyes and shook her head, "You have no shame."

Nerina slowly stood and smiled sweetly at Tala, "Jealous? Besides, you really should curb your harsh tongue, Dearie, because you know that a lady would only use her tongue for sweeter purposes."

Tala's jaw dropped momentarily before speaking, "Two things, 'Rina. One, you are sick. Two, don't worry, I fully intend to live up to my part of the bargain."

Nerina grabbed the laces of the corset and started to lace up Tala. "You're going to love how the effect this is going to have on your figure."

Tala winced, "Sure…if I don't pass out first. Take care, I was wounded today!"

"Sorry, but did you really have to go to such extremes?"

Tala cried out, "Yes! He wounded my pride and he deserved a good beating."

Nerina sighed, "All I'm saying is that you certainly have a strange way of letting him know you fancy him."

"Do not!" Tala protested. "New topic, where did you and Gandalf go today?"

Deciding to allow the blatant change of subject for the time being, Nerina smiled and said coyly, "We went for a walk in the forest."

"And?" Tala prodded.

"And we had a lovely time. There, you're all laced and lovely."

Tala laughed, "Nice try. Tell me what happened!"

Nerina was about to respond when a look of horror appeared on her face. "What time are the men coming to get us?"

Right on cue, there came a knock at the door. "Are you ready, Lady Nerina?" called Gandalf.

She looked at her nightgown and squeaked in alarm, "Almost! Just give me a moment to finish things up!"

Tala ran back to her own room, scrambling to find her dress. Nerina in the meantime turned her room into a disaster area, throwing clothes around the room and diving headfirst into her dressing room.

Gandalf grinned at Legolas, "So…are you ready to fulfill your side of the bet?"

Legolas gritted his teeth, "Of course I am."

The turned their heads at the sound of a splash and a strangled cry from within the rooms.

"Should we go in?" wondered Legolas.

"No…that would probably be a mistake," reasoned Gandalf.

Just then the door opened and the men were greeted by two lovely visions. Nerina wore a long forest green gown with sleeves trailing past her fingertips and a playful curved peasant-scooped neck. Her hair was swept up into two alpine braids, with several curls escaping and framing her face. Tala wore a midnight blue dress decorated with elegant silver swirls and classic off the shoulder straps. Her long hair sparkled with a hint of glitter and was swept up halfway while the rest trailed in waves down her back.

The men simply stared at them until Tala said dryly, "Take a picture, it will last longer."

Both women laughed at their confused looks. Looking at each other and shrugging, the wizard and elf just sighed and extended their arms, knowing they would never quite figure out these usual women.

"This is so exciting!" gushed Nerina as Gandalf led her to the Great Hall. "Don't you think so Tala?"

Tala bit back a sarcastic reply and said in a mild tone, "Oh yes, very much so."

Legolas raised an eyebrow, 'So she can act like a lady,' he mused. 'Well if she can make an effort then certainly I can show her my best courtly manners.'

When they reached the Great Hall, the doors were opened by two smartly dressed guards and the sight before them made even the slightly perturbed Tala's eyes widen in awe. The hall was lit with thousands of candles, illuminating the countless lords and ladies, each resplendent in robes of every shade.

Nerina leaned toward Tala and whispered, "This is better than watching the Red Carpet Pre-Show for the Oscars!"

Tala nodded, "Yes and there's no annoying Joan Rivers making bitchy commentary through her collagen frozen lips!"

The two giggled, causing Gandalf to smile and Legolas to look somewhat wary.

As they entered the room a trumpet sounded and the master of ceremonies announced loudly, "The court of King Thranduil welcomes the noble wizard, Gandalf the White accompanied by the delightful Lady Nerina of Virginia." Gandalf nodded to the crowd and Nerina flushed and looked at her feet.

A hush fell over the crowd as Legolas and Tala stepped forward and the master of ceremonies stood up straighter (if this was possible), drawing a deep breath. "All hail Prince Legolas Greenleaf, Son of Thranduil and Heir to the Mirkwood Realm," He paused for a breath, "Accompanied by the enchanting Lady Tala of Virginia."

Legolas smirked at Tala's stare as all in the room dropped into deep bows or curtsies. "You certainly know how to make an entrance," Tala murmured dryly.

"Comes with the title," he replied with a casual shrug. "Besides," Legolas said with a slight grin, "Don't tell me you aren't enjoying the attention just a little bit."

She narrowed her eyes, "What are you talking about?"

He chuckled, "Well as you have me, the heir to the throne as your escort, you must realize that you are the envy of all the young ladies of the court."

"Oh really?" Tala asked in a suspiciously sweet tone.

Legolas nodded, "Yes."

She gave him a simpering smile and stood on her toes to whisper in his ear, "Well then, your highness, the young ladies of the court must either be dense or they do not know you very well."

He glared at her and Tala flashed him a dazzling smile. Unexpectedly he felt a quick tug at his heart when she smiled like that and he found himself wondering how he could make her smile at him more often.

"Legolas, I believe your father is waiting for us," noted Gandalf, grinning as the prince shook himself from his thoughts and grumbled, "Of course, let us not dally." The two couples made their way to their seats on either side of Thranduil. Gandalf seated Nerina and after greeting the king, he bent his head toward Nerina and the two began whispering animatedly. Poor Thranduil, with his excellent hearing, felt his cheeks go red after overhearing Gandalf propose a certain 'experiment' to the young lady. Thranduil took a deep drink of mead and made a mental note to advise Gandalf to be a bit more reserved in his public discussions with certain young ladies. 'Then again,' he thought as he watched Nerina give Gandalf a wicked grin, 'Perhaps he cannot help himself.'

Meanwhile, Legolas was insisting that Tala allow him to prepare a trencher of food for her. "I'm not a baby, Legolas. I assure you that I can choose my own food without your assistance!"

He sighed, "Were you as difficult towards all the men in your world or am I a notable exception?"

She tilted her head to the side and made a show of considering his question before replying, "Pretty much."

Legolas frowned, "Why is it so difficult for you to follow decorum and allow me as the male and your escort to care for your needs?"

Tala glared at him, "Because in my world women have fought for the right to be independent of men and not rely on them to cater to their every need! And as far as the whole escort thing goes, in my world male escorts are paid companions and I don't think I'll be paying you to mattress dance with me any time soon, Blonde Boy!"

A puzzled look came over the elf's face at that last statement and he took a moment to try and translate its meaning. Suddenly, his face went pale and he said in a low voice, "Did you just imply that I was acting like a…" he stopped searching for an inoffensive term.

Tala patted his arm, "Yes, and we call it a gigolo where I come from."

Legolas prided himself on his control of his temper, but everyone has a boiling point and Tala was getting dangerously close to helping him reach it. Fortunately, there was a sudden commotion that drew the prince's focus from his fair companion.

"Thranduil, King of Mirkwood!" called an angry voice.

All eyes turned to the entrance as a tall man with long jet-black hair wearing deep purple robes stormed into the room. Tala and Nerina looked with curiosity as Legolas, Thranduil, and Gandalf simultaneously let out groans of disbelief.

Thranduil stood and assumed a polite countenance, "Yes, Namuras, what troubles you?"

"Two things, Highness. First, you insult me by choosing him," he pointed an accusing finger at Gandalf, "As your court wizard when I am obviously the more qualified! Second, you hold this royal banquet and do not issue an invitation to me?"

Thranduil sighed, "Namuras…I assure you that Gandalf is more than qualified for his position and as for you not receiving an invitation, I'm sure this was a simple mistake, for I have never denied you a place in our merriment."

Namuras sneered, "A likely tale." He drew himself up into an imposing stance and cast his eyes about the room. "You shall all regret the day you trifled with Namuras the Dominant." With that he turned and started to stalk out of the room.

Before anyone could react to this unusual outburst, Nerina stood from her seat and skipped after the retreating wizard. Legolas looked in confusion at Tala who was holding her head in her hands, crying "Not again!"

"What ails you Tala?" he inquired gently.

Tala waved her hands in annoyance, "Nothing, I'm just dandy! 'Rina is the one with a screw loose!"

"Why is she following Namuras?" Legolas asked.

"Well if I had to guess, I'd say she's introducing herself," snapped Tala.

Sure enough when Nerina caught up to Namuras she tapped him on the shoulder and when he spun around prepared to defend himself, she smiled and said simply, "Hello."

Suspicious already, Namuras looked down on her and sneered, "Who are you woman that you dare accost the powerful wizard Namuras?"

She curtsied and replied, "I am Nerina. And you of course are Namuras," she offered her hand, "Pleased to make your acquaintance."

He stared at her hand as if it was going to attack him and snarled, "What do you want?"

Nerina frowned at his angry tone, "I only thought to ask if you wouldn't stay, seeing as how the king said you were welcome and that your invitation must have been lost by mistake."

Looking at her incredulously Namuras growled, "Do not trifle with the likes of me woman!" With that he turned and stormed out of the room muttering under his breath about ridiculous women and vengeance.

Nerina sighed and returned to her seat beside Gandalf, not noticing the stares of disbelief she was receiving from a good portion of the room, including the before mentioned Gandalf.

"Lady Nerina, what could you have been thinking just now?" asked the king.

She looked up and shrugged, "Well, I figured his feelings were hurt about not being invited, so I thought I would ask him to stay so he wouldn't be upset."

Baffled by the strange simplicity of her reply, the king shook his head and called for the musicians to start playing.

"So," Nerina said to Gandalf, "Is Namuras a friend of yours?"

Gandalf shook his head, "No he is not."

"Why not?" Nerina asked as she reached for an apple slice in the trencher she shared with Gandalf.

"You mean besides poor fashion sense?" Tala said with a snicker as she examined the pheasant.

Legolas chuckled even as Gandalf continued to scowl. He finally relented with "Let's talk of other things."

All nodded and of course, complete silence fell among them. Everyone in the hall gradually went back to eating and talking as the incident was forgotten. Thranduil realized his dining companions were quiet and got the ball rolling on the small talk.

"It is nice to actually have you ladies join us for dinner. I do believe it has not happened yet." The king hid a grin as son and wizard grimaced slightly.

Nerina smiled as she reached for her goblet and Tala responded with a gentle laugh, "Indeed your highness. It is nice to eat outside of our rooms and to enjoy such splendid company."

Both the king and Nerina covered smiles as Gandalf's eyes widened and Legolas allowed his jaw to drop slightly. 'She really can be charming,' he thought in something like disbelief.

Tala felt her "date" studying her and turned questioning eyes to him. She narrowed her eyes when his gazed dropped and settled on her shoulder. 'The letch, he-'

"Did I hurt you very badly?" Tala's jaw dropped and all thoughts of 'Legolasevil letcher prince' scattered. The gentle concern in his eyes had her swiftly shaking her head and lifting her goblet to hide her slight blush.

With a knowing grin Nerina decided to have mercy and saved her friend by asking, "You know what we need Tala?"

"O, pray tell, what?" Tala murmured with a roll of her eyes.

"Unagi power!!!" Nerina stated with an accent and a giggle. (A/N: Unagi, and forgive if it is spelled wrong, is an eel dish of Japan, and is known to be an aphrodisiac. This scene was inspired by a comic sketch on Comedy Central, and we don't own any of that either)

Tala choked as she tried to laugh around a piece of bread, and their three companions look at them askance when both dissolved into bouts of laughter. Gandalf finally could stand the suspense no longer, and queried, "What is this 'onagee power?"

The laughter only increased and Nerina finally wound down enough to say innocently, "It's eel."

Unsatisfied with this answer, they attempted to press the issue, but were thwarted when music began to play. Nerina quickly turned puppy eyes to Gandalf and he stood and offered his hand. With a last wink at Tala she allowed Gandalf to sweep her away.

Looking back at their seats, Nerina watched Tala and Legolas dutifully attempt to make small talk and then fail beautifully. Gandalf noticed her focus and chuckled, "Doing well aren't they?"

Nerina nodded, "O yes. So polite and _perfect_ they can't do anything. It doesn't help that…o wait, we may have a plot unfolding."

Both watched as another elf approached and spoke with Tala. Nerina smiled as Blondie's head whipped around as the two spoke and Tala stood, extending her hand and smiling. The unknown elf led her to another section of the floor, and they began to dance. A glance back at the prince revealed him to be debating with himself and getting slightly angry. Nerina giggled and whispered to Gandalf, "I think the prince is a bit miffed."

Gandalf chuckled, "Indeed. But he may be taking the matter in hand." At his pointed look, Nerina turned to see the prince making his way to the dance floor. Of course, he didn't get very far before he was swarmed by several ladies of the court, causing both wizard and lady to snicker at his plight.

Legolas clamped down his frustration and politely refused them in his attempt to get to Tala. Leaving behind a group of pouting and annoyed women, he weaved across the floor until he reached the side of his escort and her kidnapper. Tapping the elf, who he remembered to be named Kothas, on the shoulder, he smoothly cut in, pushing the encroacher away and ignoring Tala's glare.

"That was rude," she finally hissed.

The prince just raised an eyebrow and shrugged. "I am your escort, I shall dance with you."

Tala rolled her eyes, "Well you certainly weren't eager to do so."

"So you go off with the first man that asks?"

Resisting the urge to hit him, or at least step on his toes, she gritted out, "Don't you dare make that sound wrong. I like to dance, and accepted when I was asked."

"I was going to ask you," Legolas grumbled.

"O really? Before or after you finished counting the number of grapes on your plate…for the third time?!"

He frowned, "It was the fourth." Her green eyes widened and with a gentle smile he continued, "I didn't know if you would refuse me."

"Of course not. Tonight, as per our agreement, I am the perfect lady," she answered quietly.

"But I wanted you to say yes because you wanted to, not because of the bet." The same dazzling smile he had seen earlier was his reward for that statement, and he grinned in return.

Both couples continued to dance until the musicians finished their set and took a break. Then they returned to their seats. Nerina noticed Tala fanning herself and smirked. "Get a little hot out there Tala dear?"

Tala glared, "No. Someone laced me too tight and I can't breathe."

"Well I can think of a couple of ways to get it off…" Nerina said with a sly glance at the prince.

With a quiet growl, Tala stood gingerly. "Excuse me, I need to get some air."

"I'll come with you!" Nerina said cheerfully. Instead of waiting for an answer, she just grabbed Tala's arm and practically dragged her away, leaving their escorts to look at them in confusion.

The women reached the patio that had been opened up for just such a thing, and Tala sank down with a sigh onto the cool stone bench. Nerina looked at her quizzically as she watched her rub her right hip. "You ok, love?"

Tala nodded, "Just tired. And I think the painkillers and salve are starting to wear off."

"Then I suppose we should all stop hoping for midnight extra curricular activities?"

With a tired laugh, Tala nodded again. "Like there's anyone here who I would consider."

Nerina just smiled knowingly, "Is so. You have one, I have two."

"Two?!?!" At Nerina's cheeky smile, Tala sighed. "Forget it. I don't want to know right now, and I don't want to argue."

"Want me to take you back to the room?" Nerina asked as her brows knit. She frowned when Tala shook her head.

"A perfect lady does not complain. So I won't. I will tomorrow when I am free of this curse, but until then, nope."

"O bullshit. You need to go back, I'll take you back."

Tala gasped, "Why Nerina!! Such language is not fitting for the ears of a lady!" At Nerina's exasperated look, Tala grinned. "I know you will, but I really don't want to go back yet."

Nerina's response was never voiced as she was interrupted by a cold voice, "Well well, what do we have here?"

The two looked over to the steps leading off the terrace to find Namuras. Tala hid a grimace as Nerina smiled brightly, "Hello Namuras!"

"That is Lord Namuras to you two," he answered arrogantly.

"Did you want something?" Tala asked with a sweet smile and gritted teeth.

"O indeed. But neither of you could possibly understand, or be of any use in that area."

Grinning wolfishly, Tala commented idly to Nerina, "How is it that we get sent to a land of gay men?"

Nerina snickered, and then covered it swiftly with a cough, "I don't think he's gay, just misdirected."

"A huh. That would be why he's wearing that," she gestured to his outfit, "hideous thing. A man with no taste."

"O hush, you're only saying that because you don't like purple. I think it's lovely," Nerina said to him with a smile.

Namuras had been fuming while they talked and finally snapped, "You two shall regret this!" and stormed away.

Tala laughed while Nerina pouted, neither in the least bit worried. Nerina then stretched and offered her hand to Tala. After she stood and linked their arms together, they made their way back inside.

Gandalf greeted them when they reclaimed their seats, "Enjoy the air?"

"Yes, it was very refreshing," Tala answered with a soft smile as she sat.

"Although we ran into your Namuras friend. Not an overly happy chap, is he?" Nerina commented casually as she reached for her wine.

"What?!" Both wizard and elf exclaimed.

"O hush. It wasn't a problem. He came, tried to talk, and left when he didn't enjoy our conversation," Tala said as she examined the dessert options.

"Yes it was very sad. He is such an interesting person, he went away before we could really talk," Nerina pouted, looking into her wine. "Ah well. We can trade Namuras stories tomorrow. For now, let's eat, drink, and be overly merry." Tala agreed with a nod as she munched on her chosen dessert, a fruit filled pastry.

When Gandalf scowled and opened his mouth to question further, he was silenced as Nerina stuffed a mini-biscuit in his mouth. As he choked, Nerina patted him gently on the back and cooed in sympathy. Legolas laughed at the display and Tala smiled.

Before he could retaliate, the music resumed and Nerina jumped to her feet and with a happy cry grabbed a still coughing Gandalf and dragged him to the dance floor. Finishing her dessert, Tala glanced at Legolas, who was watching her. He smiled and silently offered his hand. He stood as she seemed to hesitate, but with a smile he was coming to like more and more she placed her hand in his.

After they had danced for a while, a rowdier kind of music began and both women soon realized that everyone was setting up in groups of four. They quickly found each other and did the same. With Legolas and Gandalf leading and coaching them through the steps, they soon got the hang of it and were having a wonderful time. At one point though Nerina began to notice Tala's smile seemed a bit forced, and when they stepped up to do a lady's set, Nerina whispered, "You okay?"

"I will be," Tala answered on a breath as she stepped back. When she faced Legolas again it was to find him frowning. 'O damn…his hearing.'

At the next lady's set, Tala asked her own question. "Magic Man forgive you for attempted murder?"

Nerina laughed and nodded, "O yea. And I promised to make it up to him," she said with a wink as she stepped back again, laughing again when she heard Tala groan.

The dance came to an end, and with a final bow to the other couple, a slower waltz began and they went back to private conversations.

"Would you like a break?" Legolas asked remembering what the women had said while dancing.

"Only if it suits you," she answered quietly.

She felt him tense as he frowned down at her. "You are not making my job any easier. If you feel poorly, you should tell me. I am supposed to look after you."

"Don't worry your pretty head about it, I'll be fine," she stated as he turned her.

Before he could get a real answer, Nerina and Gandalf came up beside them. "Enjoying yourselves, dears?" Nerina asked while giving Tala a penetrating stare.

"Immensely," Tala answered, ignoring the look.

"Good to hear," Gandalf interjected, completely ignorant of the situation.

Tala chuckled, "O yes." She smiled sweetly at Legolas, "Everything is just perfect."

Nerina bit her tongue at "sweet" tone. 'Guess she's not done for yet. Good, the night is sooo young.' Nerina gave Gandalf the same sugary smile. Both males looked at each other and shrugged slightly, not realizing the mischief that now awakened in the minds of their dates.

They soon took another break, but this time made their way to the patio once again. No sooner had they stepped onto the terrace than they were ambushed.

"O your highness!! How wonderful to run into you here!" a high pitched voice fairly groveled.

All four turned to find an elf maiden, one beautiful enough to draw gasps from Nerina and Tala. With wide eyes the humans studied her, taking in her willowy build, flowing blonde hair, and exotic purple eyes. She preened before them for a moment before seeming to recall her purpose for being there. Latching onto Legolas, she blinked coyly up at him. "O your highness, would you honor me with a dance?"

Her target's eyes widened in fright and he looked pleadingly at his companions. "Uhh…Lady Auria…I-that is…"

Nerina quickly elbowed Tala, who was trying very hard not to laugh. Rubbing her ribs, she glared at Nerina, who quickly whispered, "Faint." Tala's eyes blinked in confusion, silently asking what the hell she was talking about. Nerina saw the lady trying to maneuver the prince back inside and the prince failing miserably in disentangling himself. She grabbed Tala, shoved her into Gandalf (who was just as surprised), and ordered in a forceful whisper, "FAINT!"

Tala's brain finally kicked in and with a wicked smile to Gandalf she slumped against him, bringing a hand dramatically to her forehead as she closed her eyes. Luckily the magi understood and prevented her from falling and exclaimed, "O my! Lady Tala!"

"Tala?! Tala!! Are you alright?!" Nerina practically shouted in "worry", swiftly gaining the attention of the prince and the would be leech.

Well the situation that met his eyes proved sufficient motivation and he pulled his arm from the grasp of the elf maiden and rushed over. He didn't even notice the glare aimed at his back before she marched away.

"Is she well?? What happened?!" Legolas asked, almost in a panic. Gandalf grinned and relinquished her to the prince who hurriedly made sure she didn't fall. Neither one noticed Nerina glance around the doorway to see where the elf went.

When she turned back, she snorted at the drama Tala was causing. "Okay faker, you can move now, she's gone."

Said-faker's eyes popped open and she straightened. Gently stepping out of Legolas's grasp, the prince watched in shock as she straightened her dress, smoothed her hair, and then bowed. "Thank you, thank you, everyone. This performance was one of the most enjoyable of my experience." She blew a kiss when Nerina clapped enthusiastically.

"That…was an act?" Legolas asked aghast.

Nerina smiled mischievously, and looked at Gandalf who was completely amused. "Worked beautifully didn't it sugar?"

He just nodded as Tala snickered. Legolas finally seemed to catch on, and quickly grasped Nerina's hands. "O thank you, thank you, a thousand times thank you! You have no idea how great a thing your aid was!"

With a blink, Nerina grinned up at him. ""It was nothing. And you may want to thank the other actors."

Gandalf frowned at their interlocked hands as Legolas thanked him too. He waved it away and in a slightly angry tone stated, "You are welcome. And now if you are quite finished…" he sent a pointed look at their hands, causing them to drop, "we should probably be heading in now."

"Yay! More dancing!" Nerina cried, latching onto her wizard companion. She looked around, "Where did Tala go?"

"I'm right here," Tala herself called as she breezed back out onto the patio from the hall.

"How did you get in there?" Gandalf asked as he wrapped his arm around Nerina's waist.

She smirked, "Through the door."

Her three friends groaned. Legolas restated the question. "Why were you in there?"

Holding up a goblet and a mini-biscuit, she gave a cute smile. Nerina rolled her eyes, then stole the goblet, ignoring the indignant cry of its bearer. "Hmmm, that stuff is good."

Looking at the now empty goblet, Tala turned mournful eyes to her escort. "Where's all the rum gone?"

Nerina dissolved into laughter as Legolas scrambled for an answer. Inspiration struck her and she rescued the Prince, "I know where it is!"

Tala rounded on her and quirked a brow.

"In my room!" Nerina cried triumphantly. "Let's blow this old person party and have our own."

Tala's eyes lit, "Yes!"

The two males of the group just stared dumbfounded as they rushed off. They looked at each other, about to question the turn of events, when they found themselves yanked and dragged in the wake of the two ladies, who laughed the whole way.

Thranduil noticed his companions were missing, and when he looked up at the sound of distant laughter, he saw the quartet disappearing down a corridor. He smiled, sipped some wine, and rejoiced that Mirkwood was no longer boring. Well, it wasn't until Lady Auria's mother approached him and began to talk about the latest harvest. He suddenly wished he could follow his son and friends…

"Okay, we're going to play a little game," Nerina said cheerfully as she placed a bottle tequila of on the table after rooting through her hidden stash.

Gandalf eyed the bottle warily, "What is that?"

She winked, "That is for me to know and you to find out."

Throwing all caution to the wind, Gandalf nodded and asked, "How do we play this game?"

Nerina grinned, "It's very simple. Tala, darling, do you have the glasses?"

Tala sauntered through the adjoining door carrying four "magic" shot glasses. "Indeed I do." She looked at Legolas, who was standing dangerously close to the other exit. "What's the matter? Are you afraid I'll beat you?"

His eyes narrowed. "Hardly. I've been drinking for over 2000 years. I doubt you're capable."

Tala waved airily as Nerina said, "True. But it's elven wine and such. Potent as that is, I've yet to have anything close to some of the stuff we've had."

Legolas crossed to the center of the room and sat on one of the cushions Nerina had arranged around a small table. He smirked and said to Gandalf softly, "In this matter, they cannot defeat us." He looked up at Tala, a challenge gleaming in his eyes, "Explain the rules of this game, if you please."

Tala plunked down between across from Nerina and waited till her friend had poured some tequila in each shot glass. Once they each had a glass, Tala cleared her throat. The name of tonight's game, my friends, is…" she paused for dramatic effect, "Fuzzy Duck."

Nerina let out a cheer of excitement, while Gandalf and Legolas waited patiently for Tala to explain.

"The game begins with someone saying 'Fuzzy Duck.' The turn goes around the table, moving to the right and each person says 'fuzzy duck' until someone changes it to 'duck fuzzy.' The direction then switches to the left until someone changes the order back to the right by saying 'fuzzy duck.' Whoever says the wrong two words must drink a shot. Also, this game is supposed to move quickly, so if you stall on your turn, you must take a shot. Does everyone understand?"

The elf and wizard nodded and Nerina bounced up and down on her cushion in anticipation.

"Alright, let the game begin!" Tala said with a clap of her hands.

Nerina immediately shouted, "Fuzzy duck!"

Gandalf followed, then Legolas, then Tala, and so on and so on for a minute until Tala said, "Duck fuzzy."

The game became interesting when Gandalf was the first to mess up.

Nerina giggled at his surprised look, "Go on now. Drink up Mr. Wizard!"

Gandalf downed the shot and grinned as Nerina poured him another. "It's not that strong," he assured Legolas, who was watching with curiosity.

Tala caught Nerina's eye and rolled her eyes as she mouthed the word 'Rookies,' effectively sending her friend into another wave of giggles.

The game resumed and after another ten minutes of playing, Tala had taken one shot, Legolas had two, and Gandalf and Nerina were neck and neck with three each. Legolas seemed to be holding up rather well, considering it was his first time with tequila. Gandalf on the other hand seemed a bit tipsy and when his turn came again he laughed smiled and said 'Fuzzy Fuck,' and managed to down his shot before falling over into Nerina's lap. Nerina shrieked with laughter and knocked back her drink as well.

Tala snickered as Legolas raised an eyebrow.

"Get a room you two," she said as she rested her elbows on the table, propping her head on her hands.

Nerina looked thoughtful, "We have one." She pointed at the floor, "This one. It's mine."

Legolas snorted, "So shall we leave you two alone...together...in your room?"

Gandalf took the opportunity to murmur contentedly, "This is the warmest pillow I've ever laid my head upon."

"Okay then," said Tala as she stood up. "That sounds like a resounding yes to me. Come on Leggy. Let us leave these two before it's too late."

Gandalf looked up at Nerina, "Did you know that I am the keeper of the sacred flame of…something?"

Legolas shook his head and smiled as he shut the door. He turned and followed Tala through the bathrooms to her room and his chuckled when she plopped down on the couch and took a shot just for fun. He followed, sitting more gracefully in the chair across the coffee table, "So, my lady, what do you propose we do?"

"Ummm…" Tala looked thoughtfully at her glass, and felt the demon of mischief rise up in her mind. She grinned at him, "We could do shots." Then she frowned, "Although, tequila is better with limes and salt."

The prince's eye brows came together in confusion and he questioned her about what a lime was, because he liked the "tequila" and decided that anything to get more was good. She explained briefly, and after thinking for a moment, Legolas stood and left the room. Tala looked at the now open door, then shrugged and took another shot, settling in to drink herself to sleep. As she downed her second, or more like her fifth, Legolas came striding back into the room, holding a bowl of red oval looking fruit and another bowl with a spoon in it.

Seeing her questioning look, he smiled and offered her a fruit. As he set the other bowl down on the table and resumed his seat, she retrieved her dagger and sliced one of the fruit into eighths. Biting into it tentatively, she made a sound of approval at the citrus taste.

Grabbing the bottle, Legolas poured them both a shot. "Now, explain this to me."

"It's not hard. First you eat the salt," she took the spoon from the other bowl and sprinkled salt onto the skin between her thumb and pointer finger, "drink the shot, and then eat the …uh…fruit." She demonstrated, and Legolas nodded.

He easily followed her example, and after doing this in silence for about two shots, his tongue was just a bit looser. "This is boring. Make it interesting."

Tala giggled, the liquor also starting to hit her too, and said, "How?"

"I don't know, it's your game," he returned with a mock glare, which looked silly because of the fruit he stuffed in his mouth.

Drumming her fingers on the table, Tala thought for a moment. "Nah. You think of something."

"Fine, troublesome woman," Tala just stuck her tongue out at him. She didn't really notice that he fell silent and was staring at her mouth now. When she poured salt on her hand for another, he made a noise deep in his throat that caught her attention. She stopped her hand halfway to her mouth and raised her eyebrows in question.

Tala was bewildered when he reached over and took her hand, and was then shocked when he began to lick the salt off himself. Her heart sped up as she felt him brush his tongue over her skin and it skipped a beat when he sucked gently and then released her to take his shot. His blue eyes, darkened with something her fuzzy brain couldn't name, never left hers. Heat spread through her body and she licked her lips, then she said throatily, "I thought of a game…"

When he just quirked an eyebrow, she all but whispered, "Body shots." His interest perked, he motioned for her to continue. Instead, not listening to the muffled warnings of her brain, she took his hand and showed him by returning the favor he had just given her. He was surprised however when she held the fruit out to him and popped it in his mouth when he opened it to question her and told him to hold it between his teeth. When she leaned forward and took the citrus from between his teeth and then drew back, the prince decided something.

"I think…I am going to enjoy this game," he practically purred.

Before her muddled head could grasp what was happening, he rose and took a seat next to her. Tala watched with half lidded eyes as he took the spoon and then dipped a finger in tequila. He reached out and took her hand, covering the inside of her wrist with the liquor. Feeling her pulse jump in anticipation, she fleetingly wondered if he felt it as her other hand reached for the fruit and placed it between her teeth. Legolas covered her wrist in salt and after putting the spoon down, brought her pulse point to his lips.

This time the heat came faster, and she felt her whole body flush again. But when the last of the salt was gone and he took the fruit from her, her alcohol touched brain made a decision. Her hands went to the front of his shirt, ignoring the tiny sound of surprise he made as he swallowed the tangy juice. Briefly admiring the skin she revealed, she coated her fingers and then traced tequila over his collarbone.

Tala almost smiled when he handed her the salt and popped the fruit between his teeth, and after its application, she got to taste his skin a second time. She liked the flavor, warm, spicy, and with just enough salt that it brought images of sweat and intertwined bodies to mind. A shudder racked his body at the last slow swipe of her tongue, and after she tossed the fruit skin aside, he all but pounced on her to get his next shot.

He went for the curve of her shoulder, and when he bit slightly, she felt her body hum in response and she gave a low moan without even knowing she did so. She melted further when he caught sight of the cut he had given her earlier and kissed it gently. His neck was her target, and she grinned against his skin when his pulse jumped. In retaliation he attacked the tender area under her ear, and gave her inspiration for her next, but she almost lost her thought pattern under his ministrations. Almost to the point of panting, she rose to her knees and placed salt on the very tip of his ears. He tensed when her fingers made contact, then groaned when he felt her tongue. But when she bit gently, his mind almost blanked and he practically whimpered. Feeling her draw back, he yanked her down and handed her the fruit. She placed it between her teeth and waited.

His fingers touched her lips and she almost swallowed the fruit in surprised. Before she could question him, his tongue replaced his fingers and every question flew from her brain. She leaned into him as his tongue massaged her lips, and gave a small moan in disappointment when he pulled back and drank. Her hands tangled in his hair when he came back and sealed his lips to hers to nibble on the fruit. But instead he growled in frustration and pulled back. He reached up and took the fruit, tossed it somewhere and dove again.

If Tala was capable of thought, she would have gladly acknowledged that the Elven prince was one of the best kissers she had ever met. When she opened her mouth to his questing tongue, he pushed her back onto the couch and covered her. The heat she felt earlier became a raging fire as his hands caressed her shoulders, hips…she groaned when they rose from her waist to cup her breasts. Digging her nails into his back, she protested with a whimper when he pulled back.

She looked up into his blue eyes, smiled coyly and raised her head. Nipping at his lips, she silently asked for him to return and continue. He in turn grinned smugly, but stood and pulled her from the couch. Pulling her against him, he kissed her again and his hands scrambled for the ties at her back as hers managed to find those of his shirt. He walked her slowly backwards to the bed, discarding clothing as they went and slowly bringing them both to the edge of sanity.

Tala fell back when her knees encountered the edge of the bed and he fell with her. Neither noticed they were clad only in the barest amount of undergarments. When they finally separated for air for a moment, both closed their eyes, feeling dizzy. Thinking it was only each other and blocking out the fact the amount of tequila and Elven wine they had, they pulled each other closer and before they could open their eyes to continue, fell asleep.

A/N: Alright, we humbly beg forgiveness for the late update. Thank yous and cookies to all our wonderful reviewers. College life has hit us both, and now we're no longer in the same city and it's harder to get to together, etc etc etc. Thanks for understanding, but if u feel like flaming us, go for it, we'd love to hear and donate all fire to the smore making machine. We're working on the next chappie, so hopefully it won't be too long…bc ….omg…didn't realize it was that long…5 months is just not right. So sorry bout that. We hope you enjoyed though and will review!!


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